on this Compu so just so that everybody knows every day we do record and the recordings are available will be made available on the WhatsApp group a couple of days later so don't ask me tonight for the recording you're not going to get them tonight uh but the recordings will come available very very soon and you'll have lifetime access to the recording so the recording goes onto an unlisted YouTube channel so no one else except you guys with the links can find them please I'm sharing the links on the WhatsApp group in good faith the purpose is for you and for you only do not share them with anybody else if you do not mind please do I have your commitment on that just wave at me if it's a yes it's for you for a refresher you can go onto those recordings 6 months from now year from now they never go away they're always there and they're there for you so I hope you guys can use them and it does serve you well and I see Michael as also coming Michael good morning I remember hello welcome back uh sorry I just have a question um the WhatsApp group uh how do you join are you on the nday course or are you a one day visitor let's ask that question I'm a I am a one day visitor because I just started a new uh job and they quite demanding of time at the moment I'm f with assessments and exams to get those man you just decided your job is more more important than us just go ahead and just no I am monetary wise they using them you know the money so that I can join into the course soon as I stabilize myself there and then I will look yeah I will join the course soon as I okay so let me let me just briefly explain to everybody that's on you already what's going on so there's two there's actually a variety of different people on this group group number one are people that I've invited to come and join in today for free free as visitors and this is literally for most of them you know you want to buy a car so let's take it for a test drive first that's the purpose behind it see who we are what is our groups like what kind of stuff do we train do I want to sign up eventually then we have a second group which are students new students that have joined that's doing the full nine days you guys are going to be on the journey for nine days to get your NLP and life code certification just by show of hands can I just see very briefly the people that are here for the first time doing the nday course the full nine days all right this should be quite a few of you and then we have a third Group which are the the addicts and I call them the addicts very specifically CU they are action Factory addicts and they've been on here before and they come back and they come back and they come back can we just see if you are an action Factory addict just please raise your hand okay there's quite a few of them here so the reason they're here basically for everybody to understand and know in future once you do any of our courses we open the doors for you to repeat at any stage in fact we highly recommend you do repeat there's a new project that we have launched in action Factory and for some students to qualify for that they have to repeat so that's why I think this group is a bit larger than usual so that's just to give you guys an idea who is who on the in the zoo or who's who on the on the group hope that makes sense is that cool all right um I see there's still some hands raised I'm not sure if that's now from previously you guys showing I know some cameras are very very smart if you raise your hand it puts the Emoji in the air Jackie you've got still got a Emoji there is that to ask a question or was that from the previous hand wave that you gave us I'm just double checking are you muted girl I can't hear you you have to unmute first I said that was p an accident I was looking at something else I didn't realize I put the hand up how do I get rid of it low um you can go to I think it's the no worries yep you found it there we go there we go all right so let me just give you guys a quick um layout of what to expect today and over the next couple of days today is going to be a lot of training it's going to be quite a bit of theory hold on to your chair it's going to be Theory it's going to be like knowledge you have to absorb but the theory component is literally what we call the foundation it's the basic understanding we're going to delve quite deep into how the brain works what is the relationship between your conscious brain your subconscious brain um the statement I like making the simple reason we decide to go buy bread and milk and we come home with a trolley full of stuff without a bread and milk how does that function in the brain happen what causes it what makes us want to eat a healthy salad and then we order McDonald's what's that that override decision making mechanism that happens in the brain what is the basic elements of who we are as humans because our challenge in life is this when we buy something that's technology you know technologically advanced if you could buy a new dishwasher you will you'll get a a user manual with it if you buy a car you get a user manual if you buy a cell phone you can get an online user manual everything that's Advanced has a human user manual the most advanced thing on this rock called Earth is the human brain I've never met someone that got born with a user manual in the hand so we trying to figure out things as we go and a lot of people get confused about some basic elements so our job today is let's get some fundamental knowledge on the platform from Tomorrow onwards we might finish off the theory but then we start going into the essential skills what's skills do I need to be a great coach and a great NLP practitioner some of the practical skills there's a few two or three different skills we need to master once the skills are done we go into techniques coaching is and NLP is about being able to take your client on a journey of change when they sit in front of you or on a computer on a zoom session within 30 minutes an hour there's got to be some kind of a change in them that's the basic element behind it and the question is how do we do it what are those techniques what are those processes required so the bulk of the course is all about that it's very very practical and the way we're going to teach that is I'll do it on some of you guys as volunteers and I'll put you into breakout rooms you guys are going to practice on each other you're going to feel what does it feel like being a coach you're going to feel what does it feel like being a client you're going to see me do it you're going to get the steps so by the end of the course you need to be able to do what you've been trained on this course it's not a Theory course and then you go and hopefully one day when you grow up you can apply you need to be able to apply this stuff literally on next week Monday well not next week Monday the following week Monday the Monday after the course that's the purpose of this course so it's going to be quite intense it's going to be a lot of learning for a lot of you guys there a lot of Concepts about the brain about who we are how we function as human beings that you might have certain beliefs around or you've been trained in certain ways welcome to action Factory we hopefully will topple some apple carts and kill a couple of holy cows and really just shift the way you think um Einstein had a wonderful statement he says if we enter a problem with the same mindset that created it we cannot solve it so one of the things we're going to do over the next nine days is to get you guys to think differently that was a lot in a short fast nutshell I hope you guys got that just for um strategy or structure of the course guys you're obviously welcome to ask me questions any any any stage U there are no stupid questions don't worry well there's some stupid people but no there's no stupid people there's no stupid questions there's no stupid people ask them if it's a question that is directly related to what I'm teaching I might answer it immediately if it's a question that's something that we're going to get you later on in the course I will tell you can we park that we will get you at at a lat stage and then we'll answer that at a lat stage so please just if you want to ask a question just raise a hand and ask it's easy as that just go and in the air I'll acknowledge that I see you I'll might finish what I'm saying but we'll get your question you can also go on the little react button I think it is yeah um no where is it uh well there's a little button where you've got emojis there Bonnie just raised the Bonnie you got a question or you just playing with the settings no I got a question um I just realized that um I don't know if the manual has changed in the year that uh since I did the okay good okay all right those don't have a manual I will put it on the WhatsApp group so for the for the one day visitors let me just put that into context quickly when you join this course we create a WhatsApp group and every day the zoom invites are on on there the recordings go on there we as a group start chatting on there cuz trust me it's going to get personal over the next couple of days we're going to get real where's the students that's done this before I think you guys know exactly what I mean there's going to be some tears possibly there's going to be emotions come to the surface we're going to get very real on this course so we also use that WhatsApp group even after class just to communicate when this course is finished that WhatsApp group stays alive it becomes like a little family you've finish this journey on and you stay on that group you also get invited to the larger Group which is your continual professional development group I don't know if you guys are aware of it for those that signed up let me just mention that if you don't know once you finish this course you go onto our larger coach the coaches group there we run at least about at the moment we're running about three to four workshops a month we claim we do 2 to three we try and overperform these are live workshops with students students that's completed the course before there's probably close to 500 people on there and two to three times a month we get together we other practice techniques we teach new techniques we do a bit of inspirational talks we help you guys with tips how to build your business we sometimes invite speakers other coaches in the in in the um industry just to uplift upgrade your knowledge it's a continue professional development you get access to that for life so you come on this course you get your certificate you join the larger group and you stay with the family continue learning industry demands it it is just what it is is that cool any questions around that all right so if you want to ask questions you raise a hand you ask a question if it's something relevant we answer then if not we park it the as I mentioned earlier everything does get recorded you will have access to the recording and it's only for you if you are a one- day visitor today and you would like the recording after today you are most welcome just pop me a WhatsApp and you know give me a couple of days run about by Wednesday you can pop me a WhatsApp and say please share the recording and I will send you the recording of today is that all right and then you'll have access to it cool all right let's just talk about the course generally um the course is not a certific it's not a certification because you attend it's a certification for capability so at the end of the course we are going to test you yes you're going to write an exam get the shock everybody there shock you're going to write a test all right shock over cool you're also going to do some practical applications that we're going to measure to see can you apply what you've been trained now what happens if you don't make it well quite simple you just redo the test it's it's my job to teach you you've signed up for course you're on this journey until you pass nobody fails cool nobody fails everybody passes it's a matter of when it might be in a week's time it might be in a month's time we don't know that yet but you will pass that's my guarantee you you've bought the course you've signed up for it and we will'll get you through you have to Mentor you 101 to ensure you get through I will you will pass there's two certificates on this course the one is a life coaching certificate and the one is a NLP neurolinguistic programming so neuro stands for the brain linguistic the use of language and programming are those little funny programs we have in our brains we call them values we call them beliefs we call them identity we there's a whole lot of names for them but these are the concepts that make us who we are as humans they create our responses our reactions they resp responsible for our behavioral patterns they responsible for how we feel about things someone might say you ugly and it just collapses your whole world those are those beliefs those little programs we have so NLP is very much focused on those programs those programs are part of your subconscious brain coaching is about goals about achievement about where you are where you want to go how you going to get there coaching is a very logic critical thinking partly even a mathematical type of approach it's the logic approach logically I know I'm here I want to walk from here to there so that I can get that that's coaching NLP says the following even though I am here even though I know I want to be there there could be a behavior there could be a belief there could be a value there could be something my deep subconscious brain that's withholding me or preventing me from actually achieving what I want to achieve so for me the The Simple Solution is not to teach coaching on its own neither teach NLP on its own I do believe the two should be merged it should be taught as one so that when we deal with our clients we are dealing with them on a conscious level logic analytical level and we are dealing with them on a subconscious level when the two parts are aligned that's when we start achieving dreams aspiration goals in life if the two are running in opposite directions if logically intellectually I want to look like a Greek god and I know I need to go to the gym to achieve that but my subconscious mind prefers to be a couch potato and watch Netflix then I am going to go into a lot of self-criticism self-doubt I'm going to look at other people I'm going to compare them with me and my brain is going to say I'm not good enough look at me I haven't got discipline and we just going to this negative selft talk that spirals into depression anxiety and a whole lot of negative emotional states so if I can get these two aligned and they know that both are going in the same direction I increase not guarantee but I increase the probability of me me achieving what I want to achieve in this world is that cool so both of those disciplines will be taught on this course and you'll get both and hopefully get them aligned any any any questions on that all right your trainer on this course is going to be me unfortunately and as you've noticed I have got a sense of humor don't know if that slip through for me if I cannot make the training fun I don't want to be here and I don't think you guys want to be here and that's the one part the second part why why we try and make it as much fun as possible is the human brain actually absorbs information better when it is in a great state so let's keep in a great state for the next couple of days and let's just have a lot of fun and we learn and we go through the process and we become better versions of ourselves so I'll be your trainer my name is Dion I started action Factory where we now 2008 2009 somewhere there um I've been doing this a while we I've trained this course a few times um in fact we train this course every month every year since we started so you know there's there's a little bit of experience I coach actively you've got a whole variety of other courses I do a lot of corporate work so ask me questions I do have a little bit of experience in the industry that I could share with you guys and I'm going to try and share as much as I can over the next 9 days some of you guys are going to feel a little bit overwhelmed I'm giving you heads up I'm going to share a vast amount of information I know it's a 9-day course originally I designed it for 21 days I've learned a lot of things over the years I've not removed things from the original course I just train it and teach it faster so it's going to be interesting week if you got a lot of social activities in the evenings I suggest you postpone them a little bit you might want to go sleep early ier than usual um there is going to be a little bit of overload be prepared is that okay where's the ex students who's ex students you felt there was overload but you're stuck through it please just Inspire these guys tell them Celeste I see you came on morning morning morning just tell these guys what what what just Inspire them to stay if you don't mind I'm putting a deep end I know me yes hello morning everyone um yeah I felt exhausted every day but extremely excited to get day so um you are exhausted but you sort of battle to sleep as well because you're so super excited about everything that you learn and how you're going to apply it and um yeah my life's changed completely Dion thank you so much is fantastic so do not I didn't you hear that last part I said the course is absolutely fantastic so do not miss one second of it you'll regret it you're sweetie thank you got someone's cell phone ringing in the background here in my house sorry for the background noises but it's it's a real house with real people all right as I said I'm going to be your trainer uh my name is Dion uh started action Factory I'm young you guys can see I'm young yes everybody go yes come on come on all right I'm a young 61 and a little bit um I've I'm married I've got a absolutely the most beautiful amazing gorgeous wife if you want to know what she looks like is talk me on social media she might come and say hello at some stage um I've been married to her now November we will be C celebrating 40 Years of a happy marriage do you guys know what the secret is of 40 Years of happy marriage she standing right here watching me this yeah you take it good all right um in our 40 years of marriage we've had three gorgeous daughters all three of them are now married the last one got married two weeks ago um so yeah one of them has given us two grandchildren so I'm a grandpa she's a grandma um that's that's us in a nutshell we just a normal happy well established family very close very night relationships with our family um life is good right Life Is Good Life is Beautiful Life is what we make of it and if we've got the opportunity to bond with people that we love it's a blessing we we loan them we they borrow to us for a while sometimes they go other places and we miss them but while the time the time we have with them what a gift what an amazing gift what an amazing gift all right let's let's just go through all this stuff here I'm just looking at everything if I've any points that I've missed okay after this course um there's a couple of things and again I don't know what if you guys know exactly what you've bought into but I'm going to explain to you so you obviously bought this course you're doing nine days you getting certified at the end obviously as a life coach and as an NLP practitioner there are two certificates certificates are all International truly International if you want to join any accrediting body in our industry you can because of our certific a level of qualification every institution takes it um so you can join don't just go and join and you don't have to go and join talk to me first I'd rather guide you which are the better ones so the certification process happened once you finished with your course and you certified now you need to get your business up and going so we've got a pre-recorded Workshop that we were going to give you guys that teaches you how to promote yourself online there's uh five different days of training that I record it I make it available to you guys and it's the Practical stuff it's not the marketing gr approach it's just basic principles that I've learned through the years what works and what doesn't work there are some workshops we do afterwards where we also guide you a little bit more we've got access to some coaches and trainers that are Masters in promoting coaching um we you know I put them in front on the platforms you'll hear them talk sometime some of them are in this classroom some of them are very good on on site building or programs are those really brilliant sales people there's a variety of them we give you access to the right ones there's a lot of people in the market that tell they're brilliant at it a lot of them are liars like a lot of them are con artists they've never coached in their lives we've got actual coaches that knows the industry that helps you guys if you really want if you need help some of them charge some of them don't there's a variety at the end of the we talk about that but you do get a short course on how to promote yourself so that's part of what you've bought you also get a very short course on how to become a public speaker How to Be an Effective speaker if you're going to be a professional life coach you are going to be invited to platforms where you are going to be requested to talk so you need to be able to get up and speak in front of an audience there are a couple of practical tips that I've picked up through the years and I teach that to you guys as well so that's an extra little bit of an add-on and the third addon as a coach you are most probably going to end up doing group work you're going to run workshops you might have to run webinars you need to know what are the pitfalls what software to use that's available for free um how to run them how to structure them the basics of that so you also get trained in that um katas you got a hand up budy um you want to ask something yes j u I guess that's the benefit of attending this course more than once I mean what you've said the last 20 minute it's almost sounds new to me uh I just wanted to find out the so just so basically you were saying that um you can do the NLP course and just focus on that and and maybe train people on NLP you do not have to become a life coach is that correct no can you clarify that I've got no idea what you refering I never said you can do this course and then become a trainer no what I'm saying is you've drawn a difference between the NLP C and the life coaching uh aspect there's a difference there that's why there's two certificates on this course every time you've been on you we train coaching and we teach NLP they're two separate things yes but my point is that you don't have to become a coach no no you don't have to no there's a lot of NLP practitioners that never study coaching and there's a lot of coaching that never study NLP you don't have to I in the early days when I did it I struggled to realize which cap do I wear am I now you know a coach with this client or am I NLP practitioner with this client and I I struggled with that to be honest and then I realized but wait a minute I shouldn't be struggling with this they should flow naturally I shouldn't switch from the one to the other um I should instinctively use both and sometimes use both at the same time and that's just to improve the results that my clients get that's the reason I teach that's why most people NLP practitioners or life coaches come on this course say the course is completely different it's simply because those two disciplines are merged into this course in in the next couple of days I'm not going to tell you guys I'm now teaching coaching one I'm now teaching n LP I just teach your brain just absorbs it as one concept that's that's why you separating to or struggling to separate the two c but cuz I've trained you as one Concept in your brain it's one but technically they two make sense now awesome all right so you get a couple of workshops after this you also get a little bit of help how to get your brand strategy so for the the coaches that hasn't been um that hasn't been gifted that yet and you've been some of our courses we recently launched a whole process where and at the end of this course I'll share it where there's a little of a questionnaire you need to complete take you about 5 minutes 10 minutes to complete you send that to me I then rework it and I send you a very detailed brand strategy literally what should your logo look like what colors should you use what type of things a couple of ideas of slogans um how you should post is there anybody who's who's some of the older students that's on you that's already got theirs is there anybody here that uh who wants to give a little bit of feedback Katherine did yours help you did you like it was it aligned with who you are it was actually brilliant not that I using it yet you haven't applied it yet no that's fair that's the breakdown was outstanding it's a lot of work to apply if you apply everything on there you're going to be really really busy for a couple of months it it gives you a very very detailed brand strategy on how to literally how to position yourself who who's your Market what do they look like what type of message do you give them all the details you need that's also included but that happens only at the end all right the there's two more things that I want to mention the one is please appreciate our training St is not a typical academic approach or a layered approach let me just explain what that is if you go onto a course and you want to you want to study EXL what will happen is you'll probably be measured where you are with your ability on EXL what's your skill set and then there'll be a Target this is where I want to be so all we need to do is layer the learning so in a vertical line you go from where you are to where you want to be coaching unfortunately cannot be trained in that process driven style so for Excel it's press this button then that then that then that it's exact step by step by step by step coaching appreciate the following every human being is unique every client is unique even though there are some clients with similarities with similar backgrounds with similar cultures with similar challenges every single time you're going to meet a new client you are imer merged into a magnificently unique scenario if you're going to follow process then we make an assumption that all human beings are the same and human beings are not we're not pro we're not robots we do have programs but we are not robots we are all magnificently unique so for each and every client your approach needs to be unique based on that person their needs their background their scenario their values their beliefs their interpretation of reality so the way we going to teach you guys is we give you a tool belt of techniques of skills of understanding of mindsets we give you a tool belt of things that you can use so when you enter a coaching session with a client it's really a matter of which tools I'm going to use on this client and which SE sequence that decision nobody can teach you upfront that's a decision you make in the coaching session in the in the session itself now that sounds scary to a lot of people but trust me if you had to coach everybody with exactly the same process you'd coach 15 people and you would be bored what makes coaching fascinating what makes it challenging what makes it interesting and stimulating is the fact that each coaching experience is [Music] unique that keeps the brain active that keeps us at a high level of focus and attention it draws us into a continual development process for ourselves it's part of the industry so just be comfortable with that cool so the the way I teach in the tool belt it's not process I teach things and then I throw a nugget and I teach something else and I throw nugget so one can say is I scatter information all over I expect your brain to pull all those dots connect them and make it yours you have to take the knowledge integrate it connected dots and grasp it for you to be able to use it that's one of the reasons why a lot of people say they get overwhelmed on the scores what happens is your brain is connecting all these dots and your brain works a little bit harder than what it does on some days um that's what that exhausted feeling is all about is that cool so don't think when I'm talking and you go what the hell is that what what what what I had done allow your brain sometimes just to process when you go to sleep at night you know your brain will start process okay Leon are you staying still connecting you did the course when you did the course before uh cell phones were invented I mean that long ago I work for a Sal company at that time remember that's true yeah yeah but yeah when yeah just remind me you did it in 2020 what's it 2017 2018 somewhere there 2017 yeah what a what a privilege to have students from that time still on the journey it's always a blessing all right last statement I want to make and then we're going to dive into the training well this um sorry star yes then I am really old because I did mine in 2013 you are as a student yeah you you actually I had a student on here the other day that I think I did in 2010 which was kind of really cool as well um but yeah 10 years still on the journey with us so thank you it's a blessing um what what a nice gift to have to have that loyalty and yeah but we've spoken Through The Years so many times we you know which is cool all right um training style I've explained that two more two more things literally one you do actually get a guarantee on this course and the guarantee is quite simple you will change and you will learn I was that for a cool guarantee um you will learn something and you will experience strange that's you cannot if you are awake if you attend attending if you're alive um if you're Focus if you're involved in this course you cannot go on this journey and not experience a certain level of change that's the beauty of this experience I still change every time I teach this course and some of you guys you might have come in with a little bit of a background experience that weighs heavily on you now I just want to mention this right up front so you guys are aware of it some people come in this course with the idea to become a coach but because of the past that they bring on to this course with him the experience they have on this course is a very deep dive into personal change instead of learning the techniques they go into an overwhelmed state of experiencing it so it's a self self change reflection almost want to call it self- purification Journey they go on and at the end of the course they go I can't remember anything I've learned but it's been a great experience that's one of the reasons why we allow you guys to repeat the course some people come in this course only to learn and not really experience and then afterwards they go I missed something want to do it again and they come back just for the experience so feel free which as the days progress if you decide no no what I'm just dipping into just you know heal myself that's 100% if you decide you want to do that on this journey and come back a later stage to really learn absorb or watch the videos for that that's fine and don't ever think you're alone in that it's happened quite a few times with a lot of students is that all right cool everybody clear all right last thing I want to mention it's Saturday and I believe there's rugby on today who are the rugby fans please not I haven't raised my hand with that I'm not a huge rby fan but my wife my daughters are and my sons-in-laws are so that Saturday and Sunday to me is family time we are going to push today I'm going to try and finish round about between 2:00 and 3:00 so if you want to plan something for later today that's round about the time that we're going to do our best to finish and land the plane now to be able to do that we're not going to take a whole lunch break today we take body breaks and they're usually about 20 minutes so if we take body breaks and you're a Nibbler or you're one of those people that requires seven meals a day um grab something to eat in those 20 minutes if that's okay cool I don't want anybody sitting in the classroom getting hangry you know what hangry everybody who knows who who's the hangry people here who gets hry you know what that is right when you get hungry you get angry okay I don't want anybody angry in the I want you guys to feel kind of cool so just a heads up on that all right please have pens and paper handy I talk a lot I teach a lot of stuff that's not in this manual you do have a manual most of the manual is written in a readable understandable English we expect you to read your manuals every day at the end of this course there is a little bit of a test it's a monkey puzzle which means it's multiple choice easy way to pass is know where everything is is that okay cool any any questions cuz be after this I'm going to give you guys a quick body break just to go and grab your water Celeste wants to go and grab a j no um you just I'm teasing just to get everything ready and then we're going to dive in and we're going to start training so is there any any course any questions about the course the structure the days um technical things any any any questions anybody has here Melissa so for me um when we spoke yesterday um I do have a couple of because I'm on need at the moment which is awesome which is why I'm really glad that I've joined the course I do have a couple of appointments like scheduled throughout the day um my first Wonder today at 1:00 um so I'll still be on uh but I'll just be driving so my video will be off okay so let me let me maybe just give you guys a bit of context there and that's good question thanks for that Melissa for you to get certified you need to attend at least 80% of a course that you've got to be in class that's not me saying that I'm I'm registered with a crediting bodies and they say if I issue you a certificate that says you're now an NLP practition there are certain conditions I have to ensure that I align with those conditions and one of them is 80% participation if you miss a section that's one of the reasons why the recordings are there you are required to go back and just rewatch that section so on the recordings you can actually literally if you were in a class and you had a meeting for an hour just fast forward but watch that section make make sure that you get everything get everything in get everything in it's not a train Smash If it's odd um hour here or there it's truly not a train Smash If you're going to miss an entire day obviously it's going to be a little bit tougher to catch up um but it doesn't mean you can't so don't stress we know life happens I've also got a life the Arts times when I need to go do something where I need extra 30 minutes or hour we are real people in the real world and we understand that this is nine days it's almost impossible for someone to go through a whole nine days and not have some kind of area where you need to take a break so let's be adult and we be a mature and we understanding around it um you Melissa I know I think you mentioned to me when we spoke you you've got some pre-arranged appointments normal nothing wrong with that not the end of the world is that okay cool all right so I'm going to give you guys a quick break to go grab whatever you need we're going to come back and we're going to take a deep dive and we're going to start learning it's about training it's about learning it's about knowing and let's sooner we start the better so quick 20 minutes body break and then we'll come back and we'll dive in deep and get ready so get a pen and paper handy see you now [Music] now all right everybody back who's not back just put your hand up if you're not back all right all right let's let's talk about who we are and how we function as humans let's dive into the brain a little bit um if you're knew guys a lot of the stuff I'm going to teach today you're probably not going to find in manual some of it you might find a little bit um if you've done this course before I might teach things that you haven't heard from that angle before so take notes if necessary if you don't want to take notes don't stress you don't have to take notes and the reason is quite simple you've got a recording you can always play the recording and take notes from the recording so we try and make life as easy as possible for you so human beings are basically constructed with three elements if I want to call that there's three elements that we use that creates our experience that um makes up who we are and when we coach as a coach or as NLP practitioner we always have to keep these three elements in the back of our minds as coaches because whenever my client verbalizes something these three elements would direct where am I going with a coaching conversation so I want to start off today and just mention those three the first one is we can call it my internal programming but the easy name for it is thinking my thoughts the ability of human beings to think now we need to understand what are thoughts thoughts are not something magical that happens as a singular action in the brain If you really go and think about your thinking if you become aware of your own thinking if you go and sit quietly and become mindful of your own thinking what you are going to realize is that your thinking is actually an internal dialogue it's a conversation when we think we actually have more than one voice in our heads you know when when I was a Youngster we had a cartoon of a character and the one should he had a little angel and the other should he had the little devil who remembers those little cartoon characters and they were always the one was saying one thing and the other one was saying something in the opposite in retrospect that's actually a fairly accurate depiction with one small difference and that is there's not just two characters there is multiple thoughts are actually a variety it's multiple voices inside of your own head I teas usually about this I say we are all internal schizophreniac because we've got this multiple personalities in essence if you want to you know if you in the kitchen and you want to work on the stove and and the plate is hot there's one voice that says put pot on plate another voice says careful plate is hot another voice says grab by handle check if handle is fixed properly to pot another voice is going to say you know careful don't spill something from the pot another voice is going to say I'm hungry what I'm making now is going to taste nice afterwards another voice is saying I wonder if my partner is going to enjoy this as much as I I want to our thoughts are extremely fast our thoughts are very frivolous our thoughts change direction extremely quickly when there's something that distracts us or that grabs us attention we can be thinking about one thing ands the thoughts go another way it is so fast that very often we don't even realize that it has happened we somehow have this belief that we control our thoughts well on this course I am going to teach you guys how you can actually retrain your brain to think better to think differently because there's different ways of thinking I might as well dive into it now so usually when we think we there's no interaction we we think about things we don't always verbalize our thoughts we don't always write our thoughts down so you have a thought and let's take something like a dream or a goal or aspiration you have in life you might be watching a movie and that thought might you know something in the movie might trigger it you think about it you get an idea you have this internal conversation about it something else in the movie triggers you boom you're there again um and you forget what you thought about sometimes you wake up at 2:00 in the morning and your brain is in a slightly different state we'll unpack that later and you have genius thoughts you're solving all your problems and the world problems and as brilliant thoughts you wake up tomorrow morning and you try to remember what you thought and you realize you can't remember and you go oh man I was so smart I should remember why can't I remember the reason is quite simple for a variety of reasons when the brain thinks it thinks with two separate parts inside of our brains yes we've got a cortex and we've got all different you know medical Parts but in essence we got a left and a right brain but in essence we've got a conscious and we've got a subconscious in reality we've actually got a third which is also the unconscious so let me just unpack those to give you an idea of how thoughts work so the the unconscious part of the brain we don't really have much awareness about we don't really have any control over really it's really tough very few people in the world can actually learn to master the unconscious brain that's the part of the brain that tells your lungs how much air to take in that's the part that tells your heart how many times to beat if one of your organs is ill or struggling a little bit that's the part of your brain that says pump more chemicals more blood more oxygen heal that organ that that's the unconscious brain the unconscious brain is obviously in your skull um it's connected to your brain stem and it's connected to your entire nervous system that creates a data loop so information goes from your brain through your body and Back Again continuously 24/7 the unconscious brain does not slow down doesn't rest doesn't stop doesn't take a break if it did you'd stop breathing your heart would stop beating and you would most probably die so the unconscious is the let's call it the behind the scenes engine that keeps everything going it doesn't have as we would explain thoughts the unconscious brain is merely and one can't probably use the word it's instinctive reactive mechanism that functions based on the information it gets and it adapts accordingly so for example when you get a fright your heart rate increases um your focus shifts there's a physical reaction some people actually become a little bit stronger or faster even that's most of that is an unconscious functionality it happens automatically fear anxiety also triggers a lot of the unconscious functionalities in the brain um so when we get into a state of fear our physic phology shifts and changes these are all unconscious functionalities so that's one part of the brain but that part of the brain doesn't have a an awareness or a conscious thought process as the subconscious and the conscious do so let's firstly then go to the conscious brain and understand how that one thinks the conscious brain is the part of the brain that most of us when we get brought up are inspired to use that's the part you would need to be able to read something that's the part that you would need to enter into conversation with someone if you want to do a calculation what is 3 * 3 originally when you're at school you need your conscious brain your conscious brain is actually very limited um as westerners we get brought up in a style of thinking that focuses on the conscious brain U we get told you must apply discipline you must Focus you must think these are or conscious functionalities but if you look at your brain if you take your brain out of your skull please don't do this at home please use medical supervision should you decide to experiment with this but your brain is roughly the size of two of your firsts put together so if you take your two first put them together that's roughly the size of the full gray matter that's inside of your skull your conscious brain is so small I can fit it onto teaspoon your conscious brain is roughly the size of the top of your pinky that's the volume of brain power that makes up the conscious brain so yes we put a lot of focus on it but in reality it is not the smartest part of the brain it is the conscious brain that also thinks critically when we when you go into a shop and you want to buy a piece of clothing that of your brain that says no you're going to look fat in this that's your critical brain that's your conscious brain there are some elements to the conscious brain that's totally different to the subconscious the one of them is the conscious brain understands the concept of time time exists on a conscious level we'll talk about the subconscious later time does not exist on the subconscious level the conscious brain can understand um negative or positive instructions give me that pen don't put your hand there the conscious brain is analytical it's critical and it is to a large extent also a large part of the brain that has prevented us from doing really stupid things the conscious brain is the part that says don't walk in the dark without a flashlight don't um don't light your hair with a match when you briy the conscious brain is the critical it's kind of a self-protective mechanism that we have it's also the part that's largely responsible for your your initial triggers of fears or an anxiety because it's the part of the brain that says that person's going to hurt me um but it's a it's a limited part of the brain so if you look at the vast amount of let's called it processing power of the brain processing power in a computer is measured in data bits your conscious brain's processing power capability varies slightly depending on what state you're in but it has a processing power of between five and N five and n Bits per second so we call it the 7 plus- 2 principle so roughly about 5 to9 data bits is what your conscious brain can process in a second which is very very little if you think that your brain is exposed on a daily basis every second of your life to roughly 20 to 40 billion bits and your conscious brain can only process about 7 plus – 2 so between 5 and N so there's a vast difference between our conscious brains and our subconscious brains our subconscious brains can deal with about a million to two million bits of data a second so so your subconscious brain compared to your conscious is actually genius and on this course I'll teach you guys a couple of practical tips how to tap into your Genius because every human being is genius by the way are you aware of the fact that you are actually genius just because it hasn't come to the surface doesn't mean it's not there it's there and I'm going to teach you guys how to tap into it how to tap into your bigger creative so your subconscious brain that's where your emotions reside that's where a lot of your reactions and responses automatic without thinking actions reside um that's where your habits reside that's where your emotions reside that's where your memory resides the differences between your conscious and your subconscious one your subconscious can deal with millions of bits of data sub your conscious cannot the subconscious does not understand time time does not exist on a subconscious basis if a thought enters the subconscious it experiences it if you think about a memory for example you can sometimes think about a memory and you have an emotional response to that memory something that happened 10 years ago can trigger an emotion in the present the reason is the subconscious brain when you elicit that memory it experiences it as as if it's happening now you can sometimes think about things in your future and you can get excited about it the reason subconscious brain doesn't differentiate between your past your future or the present when it thinks of something it experiences it in the present there's no time it's is it's just there it's like being in a big pond your past your future your present everything is just merged as one huge experience now why is that important for us as coaches it's critical because I'm I'm talking about thinking at this stage when I think I can think logically about things that happened in my past and I can think logically and say well that happened in my past I should learn from that but my subconscious brain where my emotions reside thinks differently and it might think I don't want to learn from that that was a horrible experience I want to prevent it now because the subconscious brain has got more ability to process information the decisions it makes overrides most of the time your conscious decisions so your conscious brain could say I'm not healthy I need to go for a jog I need to exercise and get healthier the subconscious brain goes last time I jogged I hated it the sweat the dust the weather the feet the pain M no like this not me watch Netflix which one wins the conscious brain says there's no bread and milk in the house let's go shopping subconscious brain remembers the taste of chocolates goes into the supermarket and take oah o la o la la o la and the trolley filled with things that your conscious brain put on the list but your subconscious brain said mm I'm overriding you your conscious brain understands you are required to budget you've got x amount of money to spend in a month and one of the items you need to buy is a new pair of pants so you go into Ed I don't know if they still exist do they still exist I don't know probably you going I don't buy my own clothes clearly U you go into Edgar to buy a pair of pants and you walk out with the entire new wardrobe come on be honest be honest you know you should be eating salad and you order pizza you're in a relationship with someone you admire you love I've been married almost 40 years to and I call her my Jim she's my wife is absolute the biggest jewel in my life I love her to bits but there are times when I'm in conversation with her logically I know I respect her logically I know I treasure her logically I know she's my princess logically I know I should be a gentleman I should be elegant I should be sensitive I should be empathetic I should be nice I shouldn't be rude I know all these things on a logical level but there are times that words come out of my mouth and as they come out I go my goodness what did I just say did that just come out of me anybody else or is that just me there's a difference between our conscious and our subconscious brain the sooner we realize that the better so what is the differences well the first difference lies in its ability to think one interesting element about the subcon brain as well it doesn't understand language the way the conscious brain does we very often focus on what we say how we say things most of the time we use logic words and we make the assumption that when we use logic words it'll have the effect we were hoping for but I think most of you guys when you realize that you've noticed that you've been surprised why is that because one of the parts or the interesting facts about the subconscious brain is it doesn't understand language the same way it doesn't understand negative language so let's test it I'm going to give you guys an instruction and I love playing this game I'm going to give you guys an instruction logically here what I'm saying I do not want you to follow my instruction I'm going to give you an instruction I do not want you to follow my instruction I do not want you not to think about a pink elephant now now do not see a picture of a pink elephant in your mind and whilst you are not seeing one pink elephant in your mind do not add a second one that's smaller don't have one big pink elephant and a small smaller pink elephant running around in your brain and don't allow the one to lift its trunk and make noise don't hear the noise it makes what's happening for you to be able to not think about a pink elephant your subconscious mind just goes H Pink Elephant it's one of the reasons if you take a three-year-old kid and you give him a very Ripe Tomato you put it into his hand if you got a three-year-old kid in the house who's got a three-year-old maybe friends or family or someone around you play this game wait get by go by to Tomato wait until it's really really ripe really ripe put it in his hand when he stretch his arm out put the Tomato in his hand and then tell him don't squeeze and then watch his face what do you think is going to happen that fist very slowly but certainly will squeeze about why because consciously here don't squeeze subconsciously the brain creates a construct almost like an image a movie of it happening and it's triggers pleasure interest Fascination curiosity o la I've never done this me do this new adventure new experience and now all at once is cuz here's the thing that image IT projects is actually a future image but the subconscious doesn't differentiate it just experiences and it feels that pleasure now it wants more of that stimulation so now it will respond it will act accordingly does that make sense so when we coach as NLP practitioners as life coaches we need to learn to differentiate in the types of thoughts my clients talk about are they conscious thoughts logic critical thinking analytics hypothesis or are they subconscious thoughts which will trigger emotions which will trigger unwanted reactions which will trigger feelings which will Trigg Trier different types of behaviors unwanted behaviors which type of thoughts are they referring to because my Approach should be aligned with that type of thought if the limitation is on a conscious level then my Approach would be logic analytical if the limitation is on a subconscious level my Approach cannot be logical analytical because the subconscious doesn't understand it I need to speak differently so one of the techniques we're going to teach you guys is how do I communicate how do I structure sentences how do I use words that bypass the critical analytical brain and speaks directly to the subconscious brain yep a lot of the techniques we're going to teach you guys are very focused on shifting bringing change on a subconscious level and the reason is quite simple because the subconscious is more in control of your life than what you might think your subconscious mind makes over 96% of all your decisions you might think you're in control of your life because you got an intelligent brain you can think critically you can strategize and you can structure and everything else but unless your subconscious brain is trained is trained cuz it happen doesn't happen by chance unless it's strained to go where you wanted to go it might go somewhere else the anal analogy um there's a story in your manual about a mahoot um on page 16 and there's a picture of this elephant and then a rider on the elephant this is a story that comes out of from the East it's a beautiful concept where they take a young boy and a baby elephant and they literally mature the two together and the young boy learns to ride the elephant now this is a tradition that started because years ago they didn't have caterpillars they didn't have Earth moving Machinery so they had to use what was available and those big things that can move stuff they were called elephants so they trained young boys with a little stick how to control the elephant and that was used to clear forests and move things around so that little rider was called a mahot now that mahoot is a young boy they're fairly small they they chose them for their lightweight um and they would ride this elephant and control them with a little stick now here's the thing did the Mahood believe he is in control of the elephant on a logic level the answer is yes because he would tap the elephant this way and it'll go right and he'll tap it that way and it'll go left and he'll take it to the tree trunk and he'll say pull and the Elephant will pull so the Mahood kind of believed that it was in control correct but it was really in control if the ephant decided I'm not going I'm hungry there's the Apple I'm going here the that mahoot has got no control if the elephant decided it wants to go somewhere else it would go the mahoot can scream shout kick its legs hit it with its stick the elephant would do what it decided to do but it's through conditioning that most of the decisions the elephant made was aligned with the instructions of the mut through conditioning so how does the subconscious work through conditioning the moment we understand that we can teach the subconscious through conditioning to think differently when it thinks different it makes different decisions cool a lot of the course we're going to do are techniques how to get the subconscious to think differently how to get it to make different types of decisions conditioning because that conditioning in the subconscious can be interrupted a lot of people think well it took me 40 years to get to this point surely it's going to take me 40 to retrain my brain no you can retrain your brain within seconds and I'll show you techniques how to do that cool any questions at this stage are we still on the same page welcome to action Factory Deep dive into learning on a Saturday morning all right we're still talking about thoughts bnny good hand up Co yeah um so I my question is there's the subconscious and then is there an additional sphere um where like your dreams let's say I'll give you an example um I will have a dream where um I'm aware that and other people call them lucid dreams um so when I describe it to somebody else this is my normal dream like where I'm I'm aware that like oh okay um for example I'll dream about my mom my mom is late um but I'm aware that she's late but I'm also aware that I'm actually talking to her about things that I actually on my mind but I'm also aware that I'm in a state that is not a normal State okay so I'm just curious because you're talking about how the subconscious understands um doesn't speak a language that we use like English and and I'm also aware in that state that I'm not necessarily using language but I'm having the ability toate as even a movie there's there's there's there's knowing there's there's a different state yeah so one of the elements of the subconscious is there's no differentiation between what is real and what is not real so consciously you are aware your mom's late subconsciously mom is a concept if she's here or not doesn't matter so I'll give you a practical simp simplistic example when you watch a movie you cry if if you're watching a movie and there's an actor that you admire that you like and they die in the movie you cry logically you know it's a movie it's only an actor logically you know there's no reason to cry and yet you cry why because on a subconscious level you are experiencing it as if it is real there's no differentiation between real synthetic actual fake it happened it didn't happen same reason why most of our fears are something that could potentially happen in our future hasn't really happened hasn't happened but you feel that anxiety in the presence why subconscious cannot separate if it's happened not happen real not real subconscious cannot separate anything from your past if it exists in the present on not if it thinks about it it brings it to life in your subconscious mind so when you have a dream about your mom on a subconscious level she's present there's no differentiation that memory is real now there's a power in that guys and I want you to let let me just share the power of that are you aware now that you can create dreams well structured dreams on a subconscious level that could give you new experiences in the present we're going to do a technique on that on the same breath are you aware of the fact that some potential dreams about your future could negatively impact your present she you a hand up good morning sorry Hi everyone morning Dion nice to see you I just want to just clarify for me the bit about the subconscious because for me I thought subconscious could only use the information that the conscious has put in there it can it can collect information sometimes without your sub your conscious actually being aware of it so let me give you a practical example there the only part of the brain that requires rest is your conscious when you go to sleep at night what sleeps your conscious brain your subconscious brain never sleeps so dreams for example happen on a subconscious level now have you ever dreamed and I remember the one time I had a weird dream that my wife did something that I didn't like in a dream and I woke up the next morning and I was angry at her and yes she is morning hi Hi how are you guys you're good and he wouldn't speak to me I just like to tell you that wouldn't greet me I had no idea what I did and I was angry by enjoy your Saturday and the rby all right so that's a Omar that's a granny just so everybody knows I kiss and hug a grany and I enjoy it just putting it out there all right subconscious brain subconscious brain doesn't differentiate between what's real and what's not real so subconscious brain Can Dream Chila you dream you have a feeling you have emotion tomorrow morning you wake up that emotion is still CED ever had that happen to you yep so is it possible then now when did that dream happen while your conscious brain was fast asleep how does that happen let's put that into context when we journey through through the I love this group you guys are asking good questions by the way can I I'm just going to share this you know what I love about great groups is you draw stuff out of me that I just love giving so yeah seeo I see your hand I'm going to be with you in a minute all right but so here's here's what I want you guys to understand when you sleep your conscious brain is is asleep your subconscious brain is not so your subconscious brain can draw on information what information well let's understand how information is processed in the brain a lot of people believe that when you have an experience that info goes into your memory there's a lot of people that claim or all life's experiences are stored in your memory no it's not no it's not number one and number two just because it's stored it does not mean it's stored accurately there's a lot of inaccurate information in your memory how does that work when data enters your brain it does not go directly into your memory it doesn't go straight into your filing cabinets so see your memory as a large room filled with rows and rows of filing cabinets they are marked they are colorcoded they are placed in order of priority um some are labeled fun some are labeled trauma some are labeled your partner some are labeled this whatever so as we go through the day data doesn't go from experience into the filing cabinet it first goes into an in I'm making this as simplistic as possible it goes into an Inay everything as it happens through the day goes into an Inay get stacked who's who's got one of those in your desk an INT let's reframe that question who's who's had an intro that's always like full it takes a long time to put that stuff away the human brain leaves things in the Inay for about 24 to 48 hours when we go to sleep at night and you've experienced this when you put your head on the pillow and you're starting to drift to sleep your conscious brain is drifting into sleep your subconscious brain looks at the intro and says okay let's process what I need to put where what I need to keep oh this experience no let's throw that away oh this one Let's uh this is my wife coming on camera where should I file this I'll put this in the cabinet that says camera no no no wait I'm going to put in the file that says wife Okay cool so sometimes I want to remember something who's had that experience before you want to remember a name or a place or something and it's like it's on the tip of my tongue it's simply because you're looking in the wrong finding cabinet and then you stop thinking about it for a couple of minutes all of a sudden it comes to you why because your brain has gone to one of the different cabinets and it found the information there so the things happen throughout the day it goes into a Inay and at night the brain goes through that decides what to throw away decide what to file where decide sometimes what I don't like this I'll change it a little bit and put it into a different cabinet that processing influences us through the night that's sometimes why throughout your day you had experience you wake up tomorrow morning and you go and I I giggle when people say this I hadn't thought about this last night while I was sleeping who's ever said that I thought about this last night while I was sleeping and I have a different idea today how did that happen your subconscious mind while it was sorting and filtering with oh this is interesting let me think about this in fact this is so interesting I'm going to make a whole movie around this that's what we call dreams we dream every single night we can't always remember the dreams but we dream every single night because all this data is just running through the subconscious and creating Concepts Shea did that answer you it absolutely did answer it but it also created one more question if I may I'm sorry to dominate um I just wanted to ask when you said when it's filtering through and sorting out and filing you said there there's going to be things that you just throw away yep now I wondered whether that was trauma and it goes into some distant cabin or does it just cuz that's an area it's distant have you been Have You Been traumatized in the last 3 minutes no cool repeat word for word what I said in the last three minutes well I can't can I why where did that where where did all of that information go into my entay some of it didn't even make it to your intro yeah right okay do you like reading Sheila do you like reading yeah have you ever read a book and then halfway through one of the pages you realize you got no idea what you've just read you got to start Ping back to find your spot again yes repeat yes I have what happened what happened to that information I drifted off I think yeah no absolutely I understand now thank you yeah so here's here's the thing the brain actually does delete a vast amount of information in the second and it deletes between incoming an intro and it Del leads from intro to fing cabinet and when I open the fing cabinet and take something else sometimes I drop things on the floor and it goes into the DB is what it is cool and I'll get into that I'm going to actually get into that quite detailed a little bit later so you guys will have more all right J I see your hand is up sio had his hand up earlier I just want to give him a chance quickly you you end up thank you Mr and good morning to everyone I have a question here you just mentioned that subconscious mind operate this way so my question the question that I have is I've heard of there this p is called ether is ether where we can share all our thoughts where we can decide to channel your thoughts to certain frequenc and then draw thoughts that you want to use is that really happening or it's something that we've been happen that's we are connected all right that's that's that's kind of more I almost want to say towards some kind of a spiritual different type of concept but I'll give you my interpretation of it I don't believe there's a a shared finding system and the reason is quite simple because I am not physically connected to you do we have similar experiences yes are there similar things in your database in your filing cabinet than I have in mind yes we in a zoom room now we all share that experience but the uniqueness of your experience doesn't matter if it looks the same on the outside differs so if there was a shared database we would not experience uniqueness let me explain what uniqueness is there is 29 people in the zoom room each and every person even though we're in the same Zoom room with the same people each and every one of us are having a unique experience because whilst you're in the experience your mind draws on all your past experiences and all your potential future experiences and your dreams and aspirations to put into context what is is happening now that creates unique experience if we were tapped into some Universal database our experience would have been aligned with that database so I don't believe we tapped into a larger ether I do believe we can share and we do experience through there's a word empathy we sometimes hear something see something experience something and we experience a similar experience to the other person I hope that answered you someone else had a hand up Jill I think it was you if I remember correctly I have sorry sorry I thought I answered yeah sorry sorry Joel I have question so because I've noticed in myself when my thoughts are on a think or negative or limiting most of the times even the things that happen in my day becomes netive or lowering but when my thoughts are on are positive even the way I interact with people so I to keep my the positive to get the positive response from people that's the r I'll talk about that later today we we I'll talk about that later today there's a very definite reason for that and something you can actually control and and you know alter in your life so we'll we'll get to that today still uh Joel you had a you had a question yes please um meditation when you're in a meditative state where what is it subconscious or conscious where are you so your brain basically has what's called your beta State that's when your conscious brain is extremely active then you go um into an alpha state which is a little bit lower conscious is still active Alpha state is typically in an alpha State now where you aware in this room but your brain is also drifting on its own at the same time then you go into a Delta State which is where your conscious brain is basically switched off that's when you deep meditation deep prayer uh sleeping and hypnotic trance when you drive very far and if all of you guys have probably gone on on a long journey there are times when you lose like an hour you were in such a laal land State you've got no recol ction whatsoever of what happened the last 30 minutes or hour your brain it's almost like your brain just left reality all of that that's your beta Alpha Delta State your TAA state is even lower that's almost like a comos state so when you go into deep meditation what you're doing is you're switching off your conscious brain progressively the deeper you go the more your conscious brain is actually switched off so deep bre prayer deep meditation uh people that do art for example musicians that play music people that paint very often enter similar States it's they'll tell you it's like I I enter my Creative Juice your creative part is in the subconscious cool and it's something you can practice um you can practice going into that so you again and I'm going to say this your subconscious is Gen one of the ways to tap into your subconscious is meditation because you're learning the path from your active critical brain to your subconscious genius brain cool everybody still with me who's who's who's still awake who's not awake at all question Melissa um I just want to know sorry I just want to know in our training will you be tapping a little bit more about like meditation um about Med just like a yeah like will you be giving us a little bit more information on that like how it can change our subconscious stuck thoughts beliefs or something I'll there's a lot of the stuff that I go about the deeper subconscious how to tapen and how to retrain it a lot of techniques will be focused on that I'm not going to focus directly on meditation this is not a meditation training um meditation is one mechanism prayer could be another mechanism self hypnosis could be another mechanism creative visualization could be another mechanism um I I'll give you a quick example do you know the saying Melissa when the penny drops have you heard that before what does it mean um that you realize that you come to you know where it comes from subconscious well yeah but who coined the who coined ha that's a bun who coined the same way the penny drops so it's there's a couple of stories around it but the one seems to be the truth and it originated with Winston Churchill during the second world war he was appointed as as the minister and he had to you know really battle Hitler and what was going on in the second world war but he realized something that a lot of people didn't realize at that stage and was he had a genius component of the brain so what he would do is he actually would have a penny between his fingers when the penny dropped it was British they used pennies he'd hold a penny between his fingers he' have a pen and paper on the table in front of him he sat in a comfortable chair with armrests those years the floors were made of wood so if you would sit in a chair and you drop a penny that Penny would make a sound on the floor so we go into a quiet space we could go into a very deep relaxed State thinking dreaming about everything that's happening and when the penny dropped when so he was pinching it in his fingers when will the penny drop when he goes into a very deep relaxed State then the muscles relax and the penny drops it's in that moment he wrote down what was in his mind what was he thinking about on some level he realized that when my I relax and my conscious brain the critical one the dumb part of my brain the loud one is silenced then I allow some kind of a genius thought to come to the surface that's where the statement comes up when the penny drops you all have that experience you wake up at 2:00 in the morning and you are genius you solve all your problems you solve all the world problems problems why are you Genius of that type of the morning because your conscious brain hasn't woken up yet you're thinking with your subconscious think about this quickly seven seven the number seven compared to the number 2 million let's Imagine This quickly in real life let's play a game imagine you standing on a tennis court right Melissa have you ever played tennis yeah okay I'm not good but I have let's let's assume for a moment you're standing on a tennis court right and I've got one of those machines that are shooting balls at you if I shoot one ball per minute would you be able to hit them back no oh one wall per minute yes of course if I shoot seven balls a minute if I shoot seven balls a second but I don't want you to hit them back I give you a huge net and I say catch these balls seven balls a second would you be able to catch some of them yeah kind of what happens if I shoot two million balls at you every second different scenario right your conscious brain can handle seven tennis balls as a second your subconscious brain can handle Millions you need to understand the difference between the two subconscious is genius conscious is Dum yes uh i' like to know they also say that the best time to study or be active well it's just a general saying I don't know people sometimes suggest if you're a morning person that studies to learn between or to do an activity between 4 and six because they say that your brain is more active does that have something with your yeah in early hours of the morning does it have something to do with your subconscious so when a child enters this world a child's conscious brain is not activated a child enters this world in a Delta State in other words only subconscious is operating it's only from about 2 years onwards that the conscious starts to function but up until five or 6 years old the child lives in a subconscious state that's where your creative resides when does it when does a human brain absorb the vast or the biggest amounts of information first six to seven years of its life why because the conscious is not fully Dev veloped subconscious is a sponge it absorbs information better retains information better um that's one of the reasons the second reason is also the way that your neuron Pathways develop and we'll we'll sort of get into that later on so yeah so early morning if you are in a subconscious state which is easier that's why a lot of people would pray or or meditate early morning they go deeper why conscious is not as stimulated and the average person struggles to calm down the conscious mind so early morning late night for most people make sense now cool everybody you still on the same P who just realized oh I'm genius I was just going to tap into it we are all geniuses we are all Geniuses we just don't know we're still talking about thinking now you can train your brain to think better the problem we have in our existing Society in our existing Society is the human brain is not being trained to think as it used to think we are overstimulated instant gratification who's heard that word instant gratification is a structured sustainable thought killer because of the stimulation we have our and the Buddhists call it a monkey brain our monkey brain is being trained very very well can go oh this is interesting oh that's more interesting oh look at this one o there we go there we're all over the place so thought process is becoming more frivolous if you don't have sustainable structured thoughts you've got nothing to base aspirations dreams and hopes on so how do I teach my brain to think differently well what I need to do is I need to get it to pause on a thought now there's a couple of ways I can do this number one when I enter into communication but more specifically into deliberation there's a difference communication is I'm just talking about something and we can change the topic easily de oh my goodness my mouth wants to say something and my brain is on the next page already deliberation is when we enter into a I almost want to say an argumentative deep intellectual conversation not for the sake of the argument but to unpack to unravel the first thing that does it pauses allows the brain and teaches the brain to hang around on the same topic to structure the way it thinks about it to look at it from different perspectives to analyze it B better to hypothesize around it better so deliberation the discussion entering into those discussions is a brilliant way of training the brain to be able to sustain a certain thought line longer to think about it from different perspectives you all heard the saying when someone does something and you look at them you say you didn't think about that did you they possibly did think about it but it was a frivolous thought it wasn't a well structured thought that hovered around it looked at from different perspectives The Liberation trains the brain to think better when you have children in your house please put those blury cell phones down and enter into intellectual deliberations about things in their lives even if it's topics you don't want to talk about what you're doing is you're allowing their brains to be trained to think that way if you got friends if you go out for socials I'll be honest I don't like to go to socials where people talk a lot of rubbish I get bored it feels like a waste of time bring me a group of social interactions where there's some level of intellectual conversation where I can deliberate my brain loves it it's been trained to think that way it wants to think that way choose who you surround yourself with CU your brain is not the other people's dobin you might as well just clean it okay second thing you can do to train your brain is learn to write your thoughts down and why why does this work well firstly when I think my thoughts can be frivolous when I want to say something to someone I need to pause and I need to restructure my thoughts so I can express it in words so I am thinking about the same thing but in a different way right when I want to write something down my brain requires a different type of thought process so when I just think about something when I say something and when I write it down those are three different types of thought processes for me to be able to write something down I almost like I have to constructed visualize it and then I can put it into words on paper but I'm now also allowing my brain and my body to interact so I'm also stimulating the data flow the information cycle between my brain and my nervous system and my body so I'm not just thinking about it in here I'm actually thinking about it in here so don't type it on the computer right by hand there's a massive massive difference in how you retrain the brain to think cuz now you have to hover and wo wait a minute when I write things down I'm also reading it so now I've got this dual passage of information coming in I'm retraining the brain to think I started doing this years ago I write a huge amount a huge amount what am I doing I'm constantly training my brain to think so I'm training it to think on a specific topic but I choose which topics I write about see I know what's good for me to think about what serves me what are the things that I would like this brain to be filled with opportunities Options Solutions projects passions desires dreams and goals so I write about them so now I'm allowing my brain to stay in that thought process that's the one part the second part it benefits me there's a wonderful art saying it says neurons that fire together wire together your brain is like a garden if a flower is not blooming anymore if a leaf is not required The Gardener prunes it when you you were young when you were four five six years old you needed to learn to speak your neurons wired to learn language how fast did you pick up language here's the thing just think about this quickly just by being in the presence of people speaking different languages you could pick up a language and then to speak it go live in Portugal for a year and tell me you're going to learn to speak about Thea even if you buy a recording thing and you try and learn a language now who's try to learn a new language in your later years of life it's insane it's crazy it just doesn't want to go in why you haven't used those neurons in a long time so the brain has pruned them out your brain develops neuron Pathways aligned with the instructions you give it what are the instructions you give give it your thoughts your words what you write what do you want to think about what skills do you want your brain to have talk about them write them think of them neurons that fire together wire together do you want to live in a world where your past dictates how you feel today well then go right about your past you want to live in a world where all the negatives from your past it takes your present well go right and think about and talk about all the negatives of your past you are training your brain to focus on that area do you want to live in a world where your past is a learning mechanism that you can utilize in the present to create a better future then go right about the Magnificent things you've learned and how you going to use it into your future you are the architect of the person person you're going to be a year 2 years 5 years from now you have got no ability to alter your to change your future CU your future does not exist yet but you can put seed in the ground today and do things today that'll grow tomorrow when you are there they'll manifest and you can utilize them you can't change your past either so might as well just use it for learning see you got to end up it I hope you guys are learning something thank you please allow me to test your subconscious mind I'm thinking as I'm listening to you I love the way you phrase this it makes you love the way I Sor I love the way you phrase what you teaching us it makes so much sense to me and I wish I could replicate the way you do this please don't please don't I'm I'm I'm unique don't take my space where must I go then you can't build a puzzle and say oh this pie should fit yeah I got my flavor I put my flavor on you got your flavor yeah just imagine if you could hear me speaking the same speaking about the same topic that you talking about right now but in my flavor like style CU I have my background my I understand life differently I went through things that creates I today in my flavor but saying exactly the same things make sometimes even some of those examples that you giv because they totally make sense for me how would that land on you okay so do you think I spoke like this when I was five T do you think I spoke like this when I was 15 I mean like my BR man when I was 15 you know like I was cool M I wouldn't speaker like this no way it was boring no girlfriend would come to me and say give me a kiss uhuh so how did how how do how do I get to the place where what do you think I talk about write about read about most of my time I live eat sleep breathe the stuff I trained my brain to be able to express it how I write a lot exactly what I've just explained to you guys super got it cool wipe out a rainforest WR a lot no I'm Teo oh I've got a weird s hum sorry bless apologies Melissa you end up yes um sorry so that's sorry if you haven't done anything wrong yet so you know negative thought patterns experiences if we write that down and then for each negative statement that we've written if we write a positive statement would that also be changing our brain pattern or our thought are you are you saying to me that if I have a negative and a positive I will end up with a positive I'm asking if I have a negative and a positive I don't end up with a positive I end up with neutral how do I get a positive add more positives if you have one negative you need three positives you have a negative thought or something that happened in your past a negative thing you're welcome to go write it down don't write one positive down go write three down why three positives so let's say you you let's say you had a business 10 years ago your business went bankrupt okay that's a negative business went bankrupt okay what's a positive learned how to manage finances learned that um I can stand up and move on learned that um I can work harder and whatever I don't know I'm just trying to thumb suck things find three things on the opposite side of the scale it's only way you're going to retrain your brain you've only find one you're just neutralizing you're not building Mak sense I mean one negative and one positive just Devils it out what do you want you want the positives to be better so add more cool anybody else questions anybody comments you guys learning Jo Sheila's leaving Sheil go Sheila go we're GNA take a quick body break guys 20 20 minutes yes go for it how's it so I love that you guys were speaking about the negative thoughts and the positive thoughts and how you get adding three positives out of a negative um something that I used to say is um with every negative there could be a negatives right um but there's one positive out of that negative and that's the most important thing you know because that that refers back to there's there's a wolf standing in the shade there's a wolf standing in the sun which wolf is going to grow yeah no no no yeah which wolf is going to grow there's a wolf standing in the shade there's a wolf standing in the sun which wolf is going to grow very easy answer the one you feed the most [Music] cuz I'm thinking now is a wolf or like a plant or something because obviously your plant need sun we all have we all have negative things we all have positive things which one's going to grow the ones you feed the most and we'll get to how that works because there's there's a process in how to do it correctly and we'll get to that as well okay Molly unmute Molly if you if you're not unmuted you just the Goldfish sorry sorry sorry so big in thought um so in in terms of retraining your brain I'm taking it from myself with any bad experience I wrote it down and in my mind acknowledged what happened what I experienced does that on your subconscious level then change how you you react or how you draw your reactions from that previous experience if you're only going to take your past experience and write it down and get your level of acceptance what are you training your brain to do oh I hear you okay yeah accept the negative that's one I'll give you a practical example A lot of people go into relationship and say I don't know what's wrong with me I always choose the toxic relationships well you've trained your brain brain to choose the toxic relationships and accept it is that though a vehicle of getting to a positive to train your brain differently by acknowledging and go through you have to acknowledge there has to be an acknowledgement the only way to to to take power back is to acknowledge gotcha so there has to be acknowledgement that's that's absolute step one without acknowledg acknowledgement and awareness how does change happen because you're still in the dark thank you yeah it's it's I'm I'm just going to add to this that's it's if if and I mean we one of the problems we have in this world of toxic relationships or abusive relationships and there's a lot of people in abusive relationships how do you get out of an abusive relationship well number one you have to wake up to the fact that you're in one and I'm going to make the second statement which is even tougher and number two you got to wake up to the fact that you've allowed it to happen I'm not saying that you're the one that caused it there's a huge difference in most cases abusive relations creep up on you nobody enters a relationship oh I'm going to I'm going to marry this guy he's going to really abuse me this is going to be fun Nobody Does that nobody does that we enter in relationships because we have hopes and aspirations for them abusive relationships creep up on you you wake up one day you go wow but unless you can take accountability change will not happen because if you don't take accountability then blame is only put on the other person which excuses you from changing and what most people don't realize we give permission to other people how they treat us through the things we say and don't say and sometimes we have to realize that whatever happens in me to me through me in this world I am accountable for unless we take that full personal accountability we don't give ourselves permission to change and therefore we cannot expect anything else to change change always starts with me stuff as it sounds it's the reality that okay would you still love me after the break okay I need a body Breakers as you see I drink a lot of this stuff and the benefit of being 61 is the speed it goes from here to there has accelerated so 20 minutes body break if you guys don't mind 20 minutes you know now let's get the recording give me three people give me a little bit of a nugget or something you've learned today someone that hasn't said much where's Doug Doug I haven't heard you speak this morning good morning you want to hear me talk there we go oh listen to that voice you you've got a radio how you doing good to good to see you my friend and sorry hold on a second ladies ladies what do you think should we get him to speak more with that Voice start it's a long it's a long nine days no it's been great thanks so much I mean um yeah just uh I've been waiting now years to do this and finally plucked the courage up to to yeah to to do it and um and I've learned already just in now in what you've been sharing today so many nice so many things that I've kind of known but kind of um uh yeah kind of oh my go hang on one second I have to make myself sorry that's cool that's cool oh look at the babies in the background I love it when real life happens it's so real that's cool uh Roa you want to say something thanks Dion just because you asked for voices that you haven't heard yet hi everyone to meet you share in the space um I think for me when you said and so much of what you're articulating is so beautifully encapsulating a lot of I think what's happening very naturally for me and how I'm choosing to live life going forward but I loved neurons that fire together wire together yeah you know being very intentional about how I live my life where I focus my attention right down to creating space and time to think yeah um and also which wolf do you feed just bringing that back into awareness so thank you I think I think one thing that you guys do should realize is and a lot of people think they come in these courses to learn you actually don't learn anything on this course everything you you've known Doug mentioned it this is like what what you experiencing is actually and I know it sounds weird to some of you guys you're actually not learning on this course you are just merely recognizing things you've already known on a deep subconscious something in you already knew it now you hear it stated in a certain way in a certain context with a certain example and your brain goes yeah that that feeling that you have of learning is actually a feeling of recognition this sounds familiar knew it aha so it's just solidifying and strengthening the beliefs and the knowledge you already have you are genius already you just might not know it but you are the knowledge is already present if you've made it past 20 years old or 15 years old you've actually just think about that that's a lot of experience and knowledge that's been stored it's the secret to life is is not having the knowledge stored it's bringing what you have to the surface applying it and knowing what you know and utilizing it that's kind of a little bit of a secret so we'll we'll tap into that a little bit more deeper Doug by the way we love the dogs in the background my my apologies yeah unwanted uh unplanned people arrived here and uh caused Havoc it's called life the first time today otherwise it's been great and and what a you know I'm I'm just super excited for the next nine days so thanks very much awesome awesome awesome all right one more uh one person where we haven't heard a voice yet from today come on Justine Jackie maybe you want to say something Jackie have you learned anything this morning morning everyone there we go hello hi yeah I am um I'm ecstatic about the next nine days that's a good um no it's um should have done this long time ago but I'm not going to go there right now but I wish I did this cause when I was 21 so I hear you I'm not going to answer that um yeah so it's basically I looked at the chat group now and it's just literally sitting going well it's connecting dots literally but um yeah thank you for this it's um I'm really I'm super excited to see what the next eight days hold good good like it I like excitement enthusiasm it's always good Shea says I'm a charmer no I'm not a charm I'm just a nice guy Sheila come on all right I'm actually extremely dull and boring in real life some people have met me in realiz after star has met me before she'll tell you I'm like really boring d boring what can I say all right that's nonsense just saying uh stain you mentioned guys I'm just going to mention something quickly I see some of you guys put things in the text um I I struggle to multitask I I I I cannot teach on here watch you guys and read but I did catch one St you said you to get IM of the different states the four main states does it have the four states or does it have the gamma State as well just a quick question just four or five states includes the gamma State you most welcome share it on the WhatsApp group everybody has it and they can sort of have Clarity around that all right we we spoke about thinking this morning right just thinking thinking but I mentioned there's three things there's one your internal programming which another word for is called thinking and I gave you guys some tips on how to change that the second part is is we've got the our physical external Behavior doing things doing when we interact now what most people don't always realize is the moment we do something when we interact we are interacting with an external which means there's information that bounces us back when we think thinking is internal and it's only happening here you can be isolated you can be in an island you can be far away from anything and everybody um you you can you can literally your your body has got no need for most of it to function for you to be able to think thinking is a very isolated internal functionality but there's a second concept that we need to grasp and that is the interaction with others and the reason that's important is because the moment we interact with someone else there's always information coming back we we call it feedback so if I walk down the street and I just wave at someone and say hello their response is information coming in the way they respond the way I interpret the way they respond there are days when I'm in a good emotional control State I greet someone they ignore me doesn't bother me I walk on there's other days when I'm in a more fragile emotional state maybe something has led to that moment I greet someone that and greet back I don't love me anymore What's happen and I go into this very deep spiral of emotion so the reason I'm using those two examples is we need to learn to realize that when we interact and there is feedback that feedback is State dependent the feedback is not necessarily accurate there's a concept that's very popular around our world a statement that people make and that's offended I'm so sorry but you being offended is St dependent you want to be less offended well change your state oh my goodness you're in control if you're offended or not it's our states that determine if we are offended it's our state that frames how we take feedback there are times in your life when you are very very fragile some can even give you a compliment and say you look beautiful today why was I ugly yesterday you could take it you could reframe it into a very negative way everything we experience in life when we interact with the world outs outside is State dependent so what does that mean what it means we've got an internal feeling an internal strategy we call that emotions feelings State there's a whole variety of words around that now there are some people in this world that when you talk to them especially they if they see you in corporate they say I'm not emotional no you are every human being is experiencing an emotion at all time even whilst you're asleep you're emotional emotions do not come and go emotions are always present some are stronger than others and very often you might even have multiple emotions that are quite strong who's ever had that experience where you feel you want to laugh and cry at the same time it's almost like sneezing and farting at the same time they're not supposed to go together but they do happen occasionally it's like two emotions where you sometimes you angry and you're laughing or you're fearful and you're excited there's that mix of emotions we are always in an emotional state trying to say I'm not emotional very often equates more into trying to suppress an emotion if you're going to suppress emotions you're just allowing them to build up a little bit they're going to pop it is like inflating a balloon at some stage it will reach its limit emotions requires not a container but a tube with two open ends emotions for them to really benefit you we need to learn how to allow them to flow how to realize which emotions we must allow to come and go let me give you a couple of examples and I'm first going to tell you metaphor think about a scenario where you're sitting next to a beautiful stream it's a beautiful day in nature it's beautiful uh maybe a piece of grass or whatever you're sitting on and there's a beautiful stream in front of you and the water is just trickling over the Pebbles and it's making this beautiful sound and you in this relaxed State hum harmonies around you and you're just really just loving the the fresh air and the birds CH chirping in the trees um it's just a beautiful day clearly not in the center of jber somewhere else in nature beautiful day stream in front of you but now a old Leaf dried Leaf comes down the stream and you see it you got two choices you can go into a state of observation and awareness state of observation awareness says oh it's a leaf it's come from there it's entered my presence my view it's part of my life at the moment but look it's going that way bye-bye leaf or you can get fixated on the leaf ooh look Leaf forget about the stream forget about the surroundings forget about everything forget about the Pebbles forget about the sound forget about the birds forget about the grass fixated on the leaf and as it passes you start following it and you go where it goes and you allow to take you Downstream away from where the Tranquil scenario you are it takes you down to the waterfall and eventually washes you into the ocean into the Never neverness feelings work the same way emotions work the same way they come emotional maturity means having the ability to observe it to recognize it for what it is that's coming from somewhere that in the temporary moment it is actually serving you a dried leaf for a temporary moment is actually Something Beautiful to observe but after that moment give it permission to continue on its own Journey don't get fixated on it negative emotions positive emotions work exactly the same way there are people that gets fixated on negative feelings and emotions we call it they make a storm from or storm in a teacup they have a pity party they or we call it they have a lot of trauma I just said that what happened something happened and there's a fixation on it and you allow this to dictate where you're going for the rest of your life guys forgiveness for that statement for some I know we've all had our own traumas I'll tell you some of mine but it doesn't mean we have to get fixated on it the skill in life is to realize that things come and go and in that moment they serve us another emotion or a feeling that a lot of people struggle with is fear or anxiety most people that you know they claim the biggest fear is public speaking and a lot of people need to speak in public or they need to do something fantastic and then fear or anxiety overcomes them so I have a very very basic question because here's what happens you're in a scenario fear enters you get fixated on the fear and now the fear controls you takes you Downstream but have you ever asked the following question when you sit on the couch being a vegetable watching YouTube shorts have you ever entered a state of fear anxiety about it no when do you have that fear or anxiet oh it's usually when you're going to do something that's going to have a potential magnificent impact in your life fear or anxiety enters when we exit our comfort zones and enter new stimulation zones of life if you're going to stand on a platform you need to speak to a thousand people you have got the opportunity to impact and change the world you might change one person but if you are you're changing the world if you don't have a level of fear or anxiety it means you are a coldhearted weirdo you are most probably very unauthentic and there's something wrong with you if you're going to go into an interview you should have a certain level of fear and anxiety otherwise you don't care about the outcome of the interview if you're going to go into a meeting you should have a little bit of fear or anxiety otherwise it means you don't care what's going to happen in the meeting you're a psychopath there's something wrong with you go lock yourself in a small room and chain yourself down fear and anxiety is actually a very natural emotion it should be present when it enters appreciate the gift it brings it's telling you you're real you're authentic you're going to step up and be a better version of you something magnificent is about to happen allow it to stimulate your senses and raise your awareness to a higher level but allow it also to do its job and pass so that you can continue on what you're busy with learning to understand that feelings serve us is the best gift you can give yourself there is no such thing as this is a good feeling and that's a bad feeling they don't have opinions about themselves they are just feelings it's our response to them that creates either good or bad there are people that have very high levels of positive feelings and they go into a complete naive state where reality doesn't exist anymore and they become unaccountable and un and not responsible for anything in life because they on this journey of only attaching themselves to the positive and allowing that to drag them into other realities even your positives appreciate them for what they are love them and take the gift it brings and allow them to pass life is not a constant life is a wave of experience there in lies our learning there in lies our stimulation there in lies our growth it's uncomfortable Zone but growth doesn't happen in your comfort zones growth doesn't happen in stag station life cannot exist in stagnation if a tree doesn't grow a part of its roots or a new Branch it's dead animals hibernate but they don't stagnate water that stagnates rot anything that's alive needs to enter a state of discomfort for growth our feelings our thoughts our feedback our emotions our journey of life is a journey of information and growth embrace it don't get fixated on single ones Embrace everything that passes as it comes take the gift it brings and allow it to pass C you're end up yes Dion I just wanted to share an anecdote you know I happened to be in a meeting with um this is at work the HR manager I was basically dealing with a conflict I was so shocked that the HR manager said to this employee because she was getting agitated it says you're being too emotional and and that made her even feel worse so after the meeting I had to go to her and say look don't don't take it that way everyone yeah every human being experience emotion but it's amazing how even an natur person will tell someone that you're being too emotional I think I think the word actually comes from you being too emotional if you go back and look at our language and how we communicate it originated on you fixate it on a specific emotion that's basically what what they actually want to say so maybe educating that HR professional in language because here's here's the thing again emotions reside in your subconscious your subconscious mind does not understand a negative instruction I said that earlier don't think about a pink elephant so the moment you tell someone you are too emotional and then I'm saying this to everybody so you guys grasp this the moment you say to someone you are too emotional what does the subconscious brain do the subconscious brain is going to ask a very simple question which emotion oh this negative one it's one of rejection what I've I just done I've just actually stimulate I've F I asked that question earlier which will will grow the one I feed the most when we communicate with our clients when we communicate with people if we going to refer to the emotions that they are fixated on if we're going to refer to the things that are happening in their lives that's bringing in the negative feelings that's bringing in the negative feedback that's creating the challenge for them the more we talk about it the more we actually feeding it NLP and coaching is not problem based we are solutions and outcomes driven if we talk about problems most of the time what the brain experiences is more of a problem if we talk about Solutions and outcomes more of the time what the brain starts to experience is more outcomes than Solutions some people have trained their brains to think problem based the whole time what you will experience is more problems there's a part of the brain called the reticular activating system in short we call it the Raz the Raz is basically responsible for the brain's arousal now I know when you hear that word you thinking arousal arousal just means your brain is highlighted focused on something think about the last time you bought a motor vehicle who remembers that the last time you bought a motor vehicle a car do you remember a week two weeks into after you bought it all of a sudden you started seeing a huge amount of those cars on the road it's like they've never been there before all of a sudden there's a lot of them what happened it was a huge decision you made in your life your brain was aroused to this buying a new car buying this new car that particular model year model type color everything brain is aroused what your Raz now does it filters through all the information of life and finds more of same information that type of car there were just as many of them on the road before but because your Raz is now stimulated you're not seeing the others you're only seeing those what we focus on is what we see what do you focus on in life it's challenges or it's opportunities your thoughts what is 80% of your thoughts busy with what's the bulk of your thoughts doing focusing on what's your mouth saying the most of what your thoughts are busy with and what your mouth is saying and what your ear is hearing is what will arouse your R to find more proof and confirmation of you I don't know what's wrong with me I always choose the bad boys to go into relation what are you telling your brain choose Bad Boys you can choose the perfect go person the prince on a white horse but your RAR will find reasons to make them a bad boy let me give you guys a quick example and this is a story that someone reminded me of the other day and I forgot it so I've got three daughters and I watch them through the years dating my one daughter had this guy she brought home I didn't like him well I didn't like like most of the boys they brought home but anyway this particular one I just had a distaste in the fathers here know exactly what I'm what I'm talking about just this distaste you talk to him in a different language but she thought he was Mr Oh Daddy he's so cute look at him he was in a fist fight once his nose was broken and standing it's so cute he smoked his breath stank it's so cute he was in my opinion dumb as a brick and had no sense of humor and he would catch a joke 3 days later it's so cute everything about him was it's so cute why because her brain was focused on it's so cute she was in love the hormones was busy the brain was numb everything it like cute so what was she focused on cute what was the brain aroused to cute so what everything you saw the brain would confirm cute cute cute it came to our house in a December it's very close to Christmas joerg one of those lacker Decembers where it's 35 something around about hot humid who knows those you in the middle of the pool and you're sweating in the water it's uh one of those days and we were watching a movie in the house he arrives with a pair of army boots pair of jeans and a green v-neck t-shirt I'll never forget that image cuz I looked at this and I went H Boots long pants today not smart we didn't have a airon windows were open everything was open the fan was running we all sitting watching the movies he's obviously starting to overheat my daughter thinks he's cute all these army boots are cute the jeans are cute he's so cute and he overheats and he takes off his boots if smell had a color it would have been fluorescent green it fed the room very quickly none of us except him could stay in the room it was so bad our social distinguished good manners left the room with the rest of us I uttered something which was in a very very definite harsh a South African accent and it wasn't a polite word it probably had a couple of rude comments in there and I left the room now my daughter has a thing about feet fortunately and all of a sudden it's cute went extreme opposite there's something wrong with this guy very intense thought and feeling went through her head cuz she's got a thing still today thing about feet all of a sudden instead of it's cute there's something wrong she broke up with him two weeks ago why cuz the nose wasn't cute anymore there was something wrong with him the breath the attitude the lack of sense of humor you name it everything shifted from its cute to there's something wrong why CU that's where the brain was focusing same person but she felt it shift I'll give you another experience look at people that find a new job when you go out looking for work what's what's your what's filling your thought process I want a perfect job I want a great boss I want to work in a great building I want nice people there I want the traveling distance to be fun I want to walk in feel stimulated it must be lovely it must be lovely it must be lovely must be perfect job perfect job perfect job because that thought is repeating through your brain it's a high emotional desired State your Raz is activating now someone is nice enough and they offer you a job and you know what your brain does your brain goes oh look at this perfect it doesn't see everything it doesn't see the complete picture it sees what you told it to look for now you working this perfect job I mean you love it so much you don't want to go home you want to sleep in the office who's been there before you love the job so much like I to stay here I don't want to go home it's so much fun 6 months later you stand at the coffee machine and you're talking to Auntie Martha now she's been there 127 years already she knows it she knows everything she knows everybody and she tells you listen sweetie you think this is such a nice place let me tell you a secret and she starts gossiping you allowing your ear to become her dobin with the stuff that the negatives the tar the dirty oil that she's spitting on you and you are now listening to it and you go you are now putting yourself into a new highly aroused mental state about the things that are wrong guess what's happening over the next week to two weeks you're going to notice them your perfect job has just become slavery and a horrible place to be guys it's the same company it's the same boss it's the same colleagues it's the same people around you it's the same condition same situation everything what has changed where you focus maturity allows us to realize that I can shift my focus and have a more balanced Focus whatever you focus on whatever you are stimulated towards you will get more of if it's bad relationships you'll get more if it's poverty you'll get more if it's lack of opportunity you'll experience more have you noticed that there are some people in this world that just seem to spot opportunities it's like I had I've got a friend he says Yad di you were born with this Golden Spoon in your mouth things just happened to you no I've trained my brain to spot opportunities to think creative when I meet a stranger I don't look at the surface and wonder what's wrong with this person I look at the person and I wonder what magnificence is hidden in the Shell where we look is where we go what we focus on is what we're going to experience this life is not influencing you you are creating perception inside your own brain and that's determined by where you focus and what your rise does learn to control your R if you don't like what you're seeing reframe it if you listen listening to a song and it sounds horrible ask yourself which instrument is beautiful some people say that we live in a horrible World guys when you look through your eyes you are painting art that no human can even comprehend when you speak you are making sounds so magnificent that no instrument can recreate it every single second of this life is a magnificent beautiful gift should you choose to take it bnny you got to end up you got ask something or say something here we are so I I have two questions um the first question is with um the work that I do I'm a I'm a recruiter so um one of the questions that frequently comes I feel so sorry for you having to go through that trauma um is candidat will talk about applying for like a 100 jobs and um getting constant rejection and I think as one of the shifts that I've had a significant growth in over the the years is really being mindful about looking for the opportunity um but I found it challenging to work with um candidates that have the tangible proof of constant rejection it's interesting how you say that let's reframe that for a second let's take a quick average number the average person that's going through a struggle like that how many applications do they do before they actually get a job give me a number 100,000 what are we talking about that's that's that's really challenging I mean there was a lady thumbs Su a number thumbs Su a number just give us number it's more about the concept I'm want to expl 150 150 all right so for you to get a job you need to do 150 applications basically according to that theory now once you've done 120 you got two choices in this world you are either you've either had 120 rejections or you've had 120 tick boxes in your only City from Achievement if I need 15 if I need 14 49 NOS to get one yes how fast do I want to go through those nose let's get these nose guys yes how what you what number you on 70 I have 134 already I'm winning is that Penny dropping both realities it's a reframe it's a reframe both realities you can see the one as punishment or you can see the same thing as a gift it's not the fact that it takes 150 NOS to get a yes it's how you perceive it it's the feedback from it the way you frame it that will determine how you experience that moment and what impact it's going to have on your future is it going to be something that's going to pull you down or is it something that's going to push you forward and inspire you there's a wonderful old book that was written many many years ago by a couple of Wise Guys and one of the sentence in there says I put before you life or death you choose to me that sentence is extremely relevant in my life at the moment you see something can make me go into a negative dark space where the same thing can say okay what can I learn from this and what gift does it bring I'm not an ostrich I'm not naive I'm not putting my head in the S and saying this didn't happen this didn't happen this didn't happen I'm saying what's the gift it brings I've retrained my R not not to look at oh this is horrible I've retrained my Ras to ask a simple question what's the gift it brings because anything and everything brings a gift every dark cloud is a silver lining as bad as it sounds as horrible as it is and I know there's a lot of you saying you don't understand my trauma well you don't know because you don't know what I've been through either we all have our own traumas it's really a matter of how you frame it bunny you said you had two stories yeah this the second one um is just in terms of like uh the the story that you shared about relationships um and uh one of the ladies a lady that I was uh coaching was talking about a partner that um she initially had like like your daughter that it's like you know they they they have compatibility and she sees that all there's potential but she's really attracted to baddies and he he doesn't have like a he doesn't have that um thing that like our right yeah so I was trying to figure out nobody nobody's attracted to baddies that's a statement that's a linguistic paraphrase no one's attracted to baddies we stimulated through excitement variety and spice it's intrinsic need need of every single human being doesn't matter who you are you need variety and spice in your life some people just get addicted to it and they don't understand the difference between variety and spice that serves you or variety and spice that does damage I'm in a marriage for 40 years I love variety and spice that does not mean I go around and have affairs with every single woman I can have phenomenal exciting variable experiences inside of my relationship with my wife I live a lifestyle of adventure with her variety and spice is a requirement depends how you choose it where you get it and what you do with it nobody's attracted to Bad Boys it's a lie they attracted to the thrill and the dopamine at Goose you can get it from running as well Cate yeah CU I I got stuck with like okay um how am I going to help her find a bad Baddie in her person how how am I going to help her because I mean she's On The Fringe Of Starting an affair because she thinks this person who's a a really good quality person is boring yeah everybody's everybody's boring at some level every everybody's exciting at another level really it's I'm going to say this again wherever you look is where you're going to go whatever you focus on is what you're going to get more of really it's just straightforward is that guys let me let me explain something quickly to you guys let me put some things into context at the moment at the moment worldwide the world has never been in a worst mental health State than what it is at or in at the moment can I take that and just make that statement out there the world has never been in a worse mental health State and what it is at at the moment why is that relevant it's relevant because most therapists psychologists coaches counselors people that work in the personal development that's trying to help people think you need to hear this very clearly they think the same way as the rest of the world you got to understand something when you're going to see a client your client is going to come to you with a problem with a challenge with something they want changed they have already most probably had conversations with other people around it they've heard the solutions they've probably gone onto Google you YouTube AI they've already investigated outcomes and solutions they've most probably applied a lot of them they haven't worked why because they based on the way we've always done things if you want to be a phenomenal coach in our current industry in this time frame of the time where the world is you need to learn to think differently you cannot give your client what everybody else is giving them just because I'm going to use Bonnie's excuse just because they say I like bad boys help me find another one if you just take that information on Surface on the surface oh yes I get that part oh yes true put it into your brain and you respond and react and Coach accordingly you are merely replicating what they've already been getting so I'm going to make a statement you got no right to charge because you're just a copy paste of something else you cannot solve a problem with the same mindset that created it great coaches don't give Solutions great Co coaches offer our clients an opportunity to think differently to look at the same thing from a different view if you take a number six and I look at it differently becomes a nine if I look at it from a different angle it can become a comma if I look at it from a different angle can become a hyphen if I look at it from a different angle it can even be a musical note it's not what it is it's the angle the lens I use when I look at it there are no facts there are no casting concrete things in this world Everything Changes based on the lens we use when we look at it if you want to be a change Catalyst in this world learn to look through a different lens don't allow things on the surface just to enter your thoughts and then you react learn to take things in reframe and respond in a different manner how do you do that train your brain to do it start speaking deliberating writing penny drop you are the captain of your destiny you got two choices in this world you can either you can either make a decision in this moment and start changing so that you reap the benefits in your future or you can all external conditions and your environment you're in to decide where you're going it's literally like a ship on the ocean either you take the rudder or you allow the currents to direct you where do you want to go if you guys are getting that part it's a huge statement I I love how's it um a lot of what you're saying and what you are discussing now I relate to a whole lot um at this current moment I'm at a re Rehabilitation um center right I'm working here uh I was once a client and now I'm like making this transition towards stuff good for you okay um so a bit of my background um so I've had a lot of traumatic experiences uh I've been in prison uh I've been shot I've got a criminal record um I've well I've been through some criminal activity so let's just say I've got this type of past okay well I'm very glad that whoever shot you was not a very good okay so now a lot of where where I'm at is um I look at all these negatives that you know what um I've got a criminal record uh I don't really have a future um all the studies that I got um have basically I've gone down the drain type of thing and um as soon as I change my um my my perception of it or my let me just say my um what word am I looking for the lens you look through the lens I'm looking through my um how I'm looking through it like um but there's this word that I'm looking for that starts with a P perception my perception of it then it changes a whole lot you know I look at things more like okay I'm I'm in rehab and I'm being told what I should be eating or and what I should be doing and I shouldn't be walking alone having accountability and I look at all those as opportunities you know because I have these certain challenges in my life where I'm not able to live life like a normal person so I take these opportunities as discipline or accountability and um that sort of thing so um yeah so a lot of what you're saying right now I resonate with um because um I see all these negatives and it's only how I see them that um I want to ask you a couple of questions I want to ask you a couple of questions quickly B yeah yeah does for April yeah 2017 still exist no okay why not cuz it's gone it's it's it's in the past okay does for April 20 27 still exist or does it already exist no it hasn't happened yet okay so that's fascinating so my past doesn't exist neither ases my future yeah cuz my past has gone well it existed it doesn't exist anymore uh my future hasn't happened so it's not existing now so my past doesn't exist and my future doesn't exist what time does yes my present it's isn't it amazing that it's called present yeah it's a gift have you ever seen an Archer do you know what archery is sorry I'm just tying up a shoelace do you know what archery is right like an arch bow AR an arch yeah okay so I created a little image in my own brain for myself right I've also got stuff from that time frame that doesn't exist anymore that I can ref so here's the concept and see this little image if a Archer wants to shoot an arrow it draws it from the quiver places it in the bow and it aims for a Target there with draw from our past to empower ourselves in the present so that we can create a future that's correct that's correct yeah and I strongly believe that because look um if it wasn't for my story and my past it would not I would not see this as an opportunity to now shoot through to my future can I say say something else and and and guys if you agree with me please raise a hand I love your Vibe and your energy and I want to see you on stages and platforms telling your story and sharing it with the world I absolutely love it anybody else give us a wave if you agree with me on that one guys and I'd love to do it because look um I'm in the IND history now where I'm saving lives and my story could potentially save someone else's life someone has gone through what I've gone through so I can use what I've gone through to like teach others of you know what I've gone to prison so you don't have to yeah I love it I love it I love it and I love your Vibe and quite honestly I'd love to hear more of your stories hopefully over the next couple of days we can hear more of I think it's a cool story absolutely it's a beautiful story I love and I love where you're focusing you're not focusing on the negatives of the path because what you're doing is you and I can hear you've told your brain what am I learning from it what's the benefit what's the gift what's the gift that brings to me now yes yeah cool all right are you guys learning anything give me a hand in the air if you are learning all right for the new guys on this course uh can I ask a quick quick question is this slightly different to what you expected it might be well um Deon Lucia hello [Applause] Justin hello everyone van awesome awesome thank you very much for sharing um no salcia is my life coach okay on the whole action Factory Journey she's an ad yes so we have few people that she is coaching and the this open day it could not have come at a better time but I made so many notes I have to go and reflect back give feedback but um yeah I'm very very glad that I attended today thank you every tell the rest of the people in your in your organization guys to everyone you need to know every time we do a n-day course like this the day one the first day it's open you are very welcome to invite guests um I I don't mind it's it's an open day bring them in let them come we've got a limit of how many people we can deal with but we we hardly ever there so this space this space Mal you put your camera on for a change again hello welcome back to the class you wanted to say something that's why apologies my camera is off because I've got a little girl running around but she's very um quiet um from my perspective I think I share your sense of humor I don't know if anybody knows this cartoon or story from When We Were Young I feel like Donald Duck swimming in that pool of coins that's dropped so that's yeah yeah what was that what was that um that rich character's name wasn't it Donald Duck I think it was duck tals Ducktails Scrooge Scrooge McDuck there we go Stefan just put in Scrooge McDuck was the rich one yeah yeah yeah so so I'm leaving today already very rich swimming in coins here or pennies awesome awesome awesome all right we got more to learn you guys ready you ready now here's what we need to talk about so we now understand we got three things we got thinking we got doing and we got feeding let's take that B that I want to teach you guys something else when we journey through this weird thing called life and I've explained this already your conscious brain can deal with about seven plusus two bits of data your subconscious brain can sort of run around about a million two million but on the outside of you the outside because you've got an inside and you got an outside yeah you got a brain inside feelings inside emotions movies thoughts everything experiences inside perception all of that's inside but then on the outside of you there's nature there's trees there's buildings there's life there's people There's jobs there's cars there's traffic there's politics there's finances there's homes there's environments there's a whole lot of stuff outside of you as we journey through life we are consistently every single day every moment every single moment of your life we are exposed to this outside world this outside world is throwing tennis balls billions of them every second if our brains were to focus on and absorb everything we would go nuts it would be an overload of information and the reason is because we we take in information through our senses we use our visual sense we call it the vog our visual sense or what we see if you look around you look around the room you're in at the moment guys how many patterns how many colors how many shapes how many words quickly look around the room and let me give you an idea quickly everybody look around the room and scan very quickly how many things can you see that's red look around the room quickly find all the things count them one two three count all all the things how many Reds can you find in the room if you got a bookshelf like me two bookshelves a lot of Reds everybody found how many Reds visual sense is amazing count it right close your eyes quickly close your eyes close your eyes close your eyes now go back into your memory how many colors blue did you see now open your eyes and count how many Blues are there oh my goodness I didn't think of that one oh my goodness I didn't think of that one oh my goodness I didn't think of that one on the outside of you there's a difference in how we experience the information cuz we really only experience what we are focused on when I asked you you look for the red you found the Reds you didn't find the blues why well there's green there's pinks there's a whole variety of different colors you didn't even look at them count how many colors you can see in your room all of a sudden that number also changes so visually we are bombarded with a huge amount of visual stimuli every second but our our site actually there's a there's peripheral view there's large image creation but detail Focus doesn't always happen visual second way we take in information is through our auditory sense our hearing so at the moment you're listening to my voice but there's also sounds in the background but it's a controlled environment if you're in a shopping center or out in nature or 30 m under the ocean there's a lot of sound so our auditory sense is also bombarded with a huge amount of data third way we take information is our kinesthetic sense that's your touch you feeling a chair under your bum at the moment anybody got a num bum syndrome at the moment sitting too long in the same position call it num that's a anesthetic sense you're feeling the clothes on your body you're feeling if you're wearing headphones if you're wearing glasses you're feeling all of that there's a feeling of temperature in your skin if you're holding a pen you're feeling that there's a huge amount of of information the body is gathering through its kind of aesthetic sense visual or aesthetic fourth sense old factory which is your smell your smell is more active than what you might realize we're constantly smelling something let's do a test quickly um I should have showed last week don't know what's going on we've got a body smell we give off the room you in has got a smell our smell sense is actually way more or stronger and has a huge fing mechanism than what we might realize I've got kids that live in the Netherlands and we picked them up at the airport a little while back cuz they came for the wedding and I remember when I hugged my daughter the first thing that went through my mind is the smell I just want to smell I mean I miss her I just want to smell her you know our smell sense is very strong and actually feeds the brain with a lot of info and the last sense we have is our gustatory sense that's your pallet and your gust sense as when you Yum Yum Yum Yum taste things eat things even your saliva changes its taste as you go through life Celeste are you and stain in the same room by the way stain says yes you say no are you guys very close to each other okay let's do a test quickly all right cuz they are husband and wife so you guys are married both of you guys will do me a favor take your finger and put in your mouth and like fill it with Salia okay now all it up in the air okay now run to the other person put it in their mouth and let them taste taste different to their own finger no no not going to work no okay she's not going to do that taste I will I tried sometimes it works sometimes it doesn't here's the weirdest thing your saliva is even changing constantly Cravings uh hunger pains all of these things creates experiences in the pallets you got five senses that is see them as little tentacles that's attached to you and all the senses do is they're collecting outside external raw data and they bring it in and inside of your brain perception is created you see if you remember biology at school when you look at something you don't even see if you're looking at a book if you got a bookshelf and you see see a book on the Shelf over there look at something in the room you're seeing it over there right you're not really if you remember biology basic biology at school light hits the substrate reflects back enters the retina and creates an image in the back of your brain so if you are looking at something over there you're not seeing it over there where you actually seeing it I'm speaking at the moment my vocal cords are not making a sound they Med creating Airwaves that's traveling into a mic through a signal binary code shot through satellites comes out your side goes into a speaker what does a speaker do speakers don't make sounds they create wavelengths air waves it's all they do travels into your ear into the M ear drum right there so where do you hear things if someone stands 100 m away from you in the shot you're not hearing them 100 m away you're hearing them inside of your brain our senses collect data from the outside brings it in and internally creates perception it's the processing mechanism that creates our reality that happens inside your brain your reality does not exist on the outside of you your reality exists on the inside of you so does your clients now here's what we need to understand about this in the old days before GPS and satellites we used to use a weird thing now I know some of you guys don't know what I'm talking about Google it it's fascinating it's called Maps the old days we used to use maps if someone wanted to come to your house you take a piece of paper who who remembers those days you'll take a piece of paper and you draw a map and like the rose and here's a te turn right yeah and then big white building green fence and you'll sort of make notes on it and you'll give that person the map and then they get lost why do they get lost how many times you draw a map like that and the person got lost come on be honest a lot why did they get lost because you drew a map based on what you thought is relevant what's important enough to give direction on the journey their perception was different they needed different reference point different types of information to allow them to Journey accurately to you why did that change why is that difference because we all have our own map of reality what we do inside of our brains we create our own representation of what the world is now I live in Johannesburg I can go to a stationary shop and I can go and buy a map of Johannesburg the map does not contain all of the information the map contains the information that the map maker believed was relevant for someone to be able to have comprehension of Johannesburg your brain is a representation of what you believe is sufficient and the correct information for you to be able to journey through life internally you have a map of reality your client has their own unique map of their reality every human being has a unique map of reality there's not a good map or a bad MAP there's a map that gets you to your destination and a map that gets you lost there's a map that serves you or a map that doesn't serve you if your map your perception of reality is not getting to where you want to go it's not serving you just change the map doesn't mean it's a bad MAP just means maybe there's a building or there's a landmark that's not highlighted maybe there's another road a turn off you mistake maybe you missed a turn just look at the map and change the map when I coach my client here's this thing you need to learn I coach them based on what's on their map not what's on mine ego ego wants to advise People based on what's In My Map so they can copy paste paste my map into their lives advice advice is when we are trying to copy paste what's on our map into the maps of others we do that without children we do that when we Mentor people when we meet someone that's a mature adult that's coming for coaching it's not our job to copy paste our map into theirs it's to guide them through a process where they find their own changes they need to make in their Maps those are the techniques we're going to teach you guys you see the secret is this when our brains are CH are challenged with a dilemma when our brains are challenged with a problem when our brains are challenged with something that's not happening the way we want it to happen did you know that the only way the brain can know it has a problem is by being able to think in Duality and also recognizing the solution let me give you a practical if you look at a window who's got is is there a window if and all you guys look at a window find a window you can look at let's assume for a moment there was a massive crack on that window how would your brain know there's a crack Let's test someone let me grab a volunteer Joel let's get an answer your window's got a huge crack on it how would your brain know there's a crack you see it how does your brain know it's seeing a crack it's a trick question because it yeah no because you know you know what it you know what you thought it should be like ah you you know ah there's the there's the answer you know what a window looks like without the crack yeah it's because your brain guys you need to grasp this it's because your brain knows the solution it has the ability to identify the problem your brain cannot identify problems without comprehending solution is the strategy of the solution as clear as the problem let me tell you just connect cup Dots here I and I mentioned this earlier your conscious brain is also called your critical brain the conscious brain is the one that identifies the problem the subconscious brain is the one that identifies the solution unless you know how to listen to both you're only going to hear a problem you're not going to hear a solution what do we do in NLP our job when my client brings me a problem is not to give them a solution but to do a technique or a process on them to bring the solution that's already inside of their subconscious brain to bring that solution to the surface that's all I need to do Jo you say you know what it is meant to look like or you you know what the solution should be your brain can only your brain can only comprehend if it thinks in Duality so I'll give you another example you can only comprehend up if you have understanding of down you can only comprehend left if you have understanding of right what happens left does not exist without right problem does not exist without solution but what happens if you think the solution is X but meantime it's supposed to be y well how do you know hold on on hold on hold on hold on how do hold on is it X according to you according to your client according to the client if the client had to think that [Music] um they they always we'll go to men because that's the area I work in is relationships they always attract the wrong men they always whatever and that's because of how they grew up I I have a client like this at the so you you've just given me three or four Clues already in that statement we're going to get to one of the first skills and techniques that we're going to teach you guys and that's how to listen to what people say and know how to ask the right questions so they can look at the same scenario from a different perspective so what you're dealing with now we we'll we'll sort of get to that tomorrow so be patient a little bit on that I need you for now to grasp problem cannot exist on its own inside the human brain it requires The Duality for comprehension if a client says there's my husband has a problem for them to be able to identify the problem the potential solution must also exist in the brain the one cannot exist without the other if the client has a problem or can identify a problem means they also have a solution and can identify a solution that's the basics Basics we need to understand because if we don't grasp that guys then we are going to want to give them solution number one number two the solutions we're going to give them is going to be from our map our reference point of what's right and what's wrong there's a process where you take them through so they come up with a solution that serves them there's a due diligence process I'll teach you guys how to do that so that their solution will serve them in the present and in their future so I hear you Jill but you need to understand that concept so so so grab grab that duality of the thought process first then we'll get to the second level cool Sheila you a good yeah I just I just wanted is a side thought really to the concepts we're talking about and that is that it almost makes me think we've already made that decision before we speak although we we think when we speak we we're making the decision at that point it sounds like to me that the decision's made and then we're just voicing it out if that makes like a bubble if you cannot speak before you think um you know it's unfortunate there is a prerequisite of of the spoken word is the thought but our thoughts are extremely extremely fast so we sometimes think we think faster than what we might realize when we speaking we actually thinking so fast we we're not consciously aware of the thought process we speak faster than what we can consciously be aware of our thoughts so yeah there are sometimes things that come out of our mouth there is a pre to it but anything we do in the moment anything we do be it what we say be it how we react how decisions we make things we say in that particular moment we do believe it's the best choice available interesting a split second later or a month later hindsight very often says oh that was a bad choice yeah but in the moment the brain makes the best decision it POS it thinks it can at that moment with the available information it has access to in the moment right s we always make what we think is the right decision for us we always do the things we think is the right thing for us to do but that's in the moment and and we've all been there how many times have any of you guys You' done something and literally like a split second later you went that wasn't a good idea that's hindsight that came afterwards but in that moment you thought it was a good idea so present thought believes it right just thank you which is a weird concept we think around us cool all right so what have we got we've got a vast amount of information on the outside we've got an internal perception this information wants to get into our brains but if everything got in this room would be way too full and the walls would exp would explode so what the brain needs to do to survive it needs to reduce or filter down this vast amount of external information into a usable amount that the brain can comprehend there's a filtering process we need to understand the filtering process and to a certain extent that might link to what some of your clients mentioned just to connect there um we need to understand the filtering you guys want to know how the filtering process works cuz it's magnificent if you know okay let me tell you after the break 20 minutes body break 20 minutes body break then we'll talk about the fing mechanism Sheila what you munching I love asking questions when someone has got a mouthful my husband makes billong oh cool yeah nice it's yummy I can't get enough of it yep of the husband my husband yeah so what's yummy the bolong or the husband both okay good for you that's the right thing to say isn't it it is it is yeah it's genuine it's genuine he yummy no what a pleasure what what a gift if we have someone in the in our Liv we actually love and care about right yeah for sure I went on holiday to South Africa and most people bring back a um present of sort I don't know some sort of craft or something no I brought back a husband well that is a sort of craft to [Laughter] business all right let's move on let's talk about filters let's talk about filters I said I'm going to try and finish between two and three today and I just realized hey we need to pick up speed now so what's the concept of filters there's a vast amount of information in this amazing thing called this Cosmic pot of soup called life and it's constantly coming towards us every second even whilst we sleep cuz our senses are not off when we sleep they relaxed but they're not off we hear come on we feel if you called you wake up our senses are active so we are collecting data even though we are sleeping so every day 24/7 we are exposed to information if we took in everything it would be an overload we would we would go Bonkers we would be insane if we had a focus on everything and think about everything and be actively involved with all the external Ro data we would be nuts so the brain for selfs survival needs to reduce the volume of information and this is absolutely guys what I'm going to teach you guys now this is critical critical for a variety of reasons one you need to understand this to be a good coach but some of the techniques we're going to teach you guys are based on this principle so you've got to grasp it I'm going to refer back to this over the next nine days constantly so the brain mainly does three things so it can cope with a vast amount of information number one it deletes a lot and I touched on this earlier when you read a good book there are times whilst you're reading your brain just deletes that information none of you can repeat what I've said word for word over the last two minutes your brain has already deleted a lot of that information sometimes the brain deletes very quickly if you are someone that wears reading glasses like I do and I see a few of you do who has ever been looking for their glasses sweetie you know where I saw my glasses even the kinesthetic feeling that it's on top of your head your brain has deleted that sometimes you put your car keys down literally 5 minutes later you got absolutely no idea where you put it uh the one thing that we giggle about we've had kids in the house and I've got the same thing is when you look for the peanut butter in the cupboard who's been there before sweey where's the peanut butter it's on the middle shelf in the middle no it's not I'm looking at it and then she comes past you puts the arm past you really takes it right in front of your eyes it was right there and you just didn't see it your brain totally deleted Sometimes some some of you guys drive the same route to work who drives the same route you got to take the same turn offs same route to work every single day who's missed a turnoff you've driven that route like years nonstop every single day and just one day something happens then you just missed the turn off what happened brain just deleted information deleted we sometimes I mean my wife and I we love deep conversations we sometimes have deep conversations but my brain like any anybody else sometimes goes other places and there are times when we're in the conversation and halfway through I realize I've got no idea what you just said zero here's the thing about deletion your brain would explode if you don't so ladies if it's game time hubby sitting with a remote and watching the Telly don't talk to him cuz if you do his brain will explode he can only deal with so much data okay he has to delete something so when he ignores you don't get angry go hug him and say I'm so grateful your BL brain didn't explode when we as leaders in our work environment some of you guys are sitting in corporate jobs you leaders maybe you run a business we give instructions to others very often we give instructions to other people they don't follow the instructions word for word and then we give them a written warning delion is natural if you're going to say something which is so important that the world will stop turning on its axle if the other person doesn't hear it say it in such an exciting interesting way that they might just hear it and not delete it as coaches we take accountability for our communication if I'm coaching my client there are some crucial facts that my client might share with me which they will delete there are some crucial facts that they are going to share with me which my brain in listening to them will delete I need to learn to listen not only to what is part of the conversation but what is also being deleted out of the conversation what is being said is as important as what is not being said especially the sections that are deleted what the human brain does we actually we've grown accustomed to the deletion process and we fill in the blanks with with our own thoughts and our own map our own references we call it coming to conclusions or making assumptions so I'll give you guys a quick example who wants to be my my guest coach who can I play with yeah anybody um come on come on come on come on come on anybody volunteer one person just put up a hand she your hand went up first let's assume quickly that you're a coach I'm your client and I come to you and say Sheila uh I'm a female I said sh can you coach me please I've got a massive problem what's your answer what's my answer um tell me about it my husband beats me every Friday night oh my goodness you've got me um can you tell me some more what what let me let me ask you this question your brain your brain has already created a movie right yeah what's the movie what are you seeing what's happening yeah I'm seeing a lounge I'm seeing a a woman sitting on a sofa which is me I'm seeing him ranting and raving and he's drunk and I'm really in there who's already felt a little bit of empathy for this poor woman being beaten up on a Friday night by a drunk husband he's he's gone to work he went to the pub he got drunk he came home and now there's domestic violence put your hand in the air if that was your image put your hand in your in the air all right maybe they were playing a game yeah so here's the thing I gave you information but I deleted a huge amount of critical information yes and your brain went and said hm let me color in the picture right according to what's in my brain you see what happens on a Friday night is they play chess okay can you cat me yes sir why my husband beats me every Friday night doing what playing chess okay different story did you guys notice how fast you jumped to your own conclusion made your own assumptions that's the risk when there's a conversation and there's critical information deleted your role as a coach is not to jump to your own conclusions or color in the Picture Your Role is to listen actively and hear not just what's being said but hear that hold on here is a lack of information there's a vast amount of critical data that's deleted retrain your brain to listen differently and the only way we can listen differently is we need to L learn to listen actively in other words don't try and and this is something we do very often when someone talks to us we try and think what we're going to say next so we can smart sound smart that's not listening that's thinking you cannot think and listen at the same time you can't really do that multitasking accurately switch off your own thoughts switch off your own ego switch off your own assumption switch off your own reality everything is on what is the client saying and what are they not saying learn to listen to the facts the words and learn to listen to deletion because for you to be a great coach you want to coach your client accurately and you need a full picture to be able to coach them accurately cool proper nuggets what you've just said sorry Doug those were proper nuggets those hit hard that's real that's real good stuff what you've just said yeah we delete the problem the problem is and I am going to frame this in this way cuz I need you guys to GR hit it is our ego that gets offended when other people delete as coaches we unfortunately need to park our ego I'm not saying you shouldn't have a ego you should have a ego but don't let it override the coaching session park it learn to listen actively if the client and here's the thing even when you talk to your client you've got to appreciate that they are going to delete some of the things you say so even when I teach I know you guys are going to delete some of the things I say so what do I do I say the same thing if you listen carefully I say the same thing from a different angle with a different metaphor with a different story I actually repeat myself about three or four times with everything I say so what am I doing I'm trying to find different angles with the hope that one of them actually is not being deleted it's called effective communic ation cool as a coach as a coach don't say something once and assume the client got it you can do a backtrack so you can ask them is it clear tell me how you're experiencing it what your thoughts around it so you're getting that feedback or if they say something to you you can backtrack so what you're saying is and then you repeat their own words back to them that gives you that understanding that I heard what they said they heard what I said we now know what each other is saying how many times have we been in a conversation someone else repeats what we've just said and we go no no no that's not what I meant because we've deleted some of the information and we want to rephrase it and we want to make sure that they get the the accurate information yep cool all right first thing we do is we delete right if you guys got that or have you deleted that concept all right second thing the brain does and this is the one that I really enjoy I find this so fascinating the brain distorts so I mentioned earlier we create our own internal map and when I told the story about you know my husband beats me every Friday night what the brain does it goes back into our own reference our own map our own experence experiences and it colors in accordingly so it very often distorts a story based on our experience so you know I picked Sheila and clearly you know we know what happens in that house on a [Laughter] Friday sorry I just had to bring that joke just teasing but at the moment a lot of people fall for that story simply because domestic violence is a big thing in most of the world at the moment so all of our heads we're exposed to it so if someone says my husband beats me that's where the brain goes why because that's what my experience is filled with we hear things based on our own experiences so I'm going to do a quick little test with you guys just something I want to uh do with you guys for a SI give me a moment [Music] screen document I'm to change this things um I don't want to do a full screen where's the Whiteboard gone on this thing I think it's that thing I'm not sure I think this might be my entire computer screen SI can you guys you seeing my whole screen right that's not what I wanted all right I don't know how to do the Whiteboard anymore I'll have to figure that out click click on the three dots where it says more on your bottom thing it'll say more you click there and there it says [Music] whiteboard why do they make it so complex and move it to where the other where it used to be these guys I ha it when they don't realize I'm over 60 I'm slower in staying rest of what's happening but I do my best all right it is taking its time to load the Whiteboard um so yeah Let Me Entertain can I should I sing and dance for you guys while we wait oh man control still waiting yeah I hear you no you said singing and dancing you were going to give us some uh you know what this thing is just really frustrating me um I'm just going to close it I'm going to let's do it another way I'm going to spell a word for you guys I'm going to give you three letters you guys ready I'm going to spell a word I'm going to give you three letters and what I want you to do is take your pen and your paper as I say the letters I want you to write them down is that okay first letter is C third letter in the alphabet a a b c c write down the letter c second letter is the first letter in the alphabet a and the third letter I don't know where it is in the alphabet it's t it's going to take too long to God so you got a word in front of you right I'm not going to say the word what I want you to do is I want you to look at the word and ask yourself if I see this word an image pops into my bra what is that image that's what I want to know so I'm going to ask a couple of you guys what is the image that has popped into your brain sonali let's go with you first what image did you see there uh cat well is a word that you chose yeah ginger cat cat okay I I've got no idea what a ginger cat is you talking about a domestic animal or what what is it is it a spice what are you talking about when you said cat J you cat a pet a furry animal okay how big is it roughly um let's say uh uh 60 cm okay all right okay so you're talking about domestic pet it's furry and it's about 60 cm where where did you see it uh in my yard in your yard all right yeah let's just check quickly is anybody else that saw exactly the same image did anybody see the same domestic creature that's Ginger that's furry that's about 60 cm in sonar's yard if you did you're weird but let's just check is there anybody that one right all right what else did you guys see who saw something um who also saw something similar let's do a quick test uh ban what did you see B uh I actually saw a black cat going down the street okay also a domestic animal or a leopard cuz a black cat could be a leopard right or Jaguar yeah it could be a Jaguar yeah so what did you see a jaguar or domestic animal a domestic animal a domestic one so okay A black cat walking down the street all right uh Justine what do you see stain says you saw a lion a gray cat a gray cat it sounds like one you guys kind of saw a domestic animal is there anybody here that saw something else than a domestic animal Jackie go you want to cheat don't cheat Jackie I saw a cat on the open ocean so a boat oh catarang a boat that is a cool one that's a cool one nice water baby ocean baby there we go nice domestic animal is the last thing on my brain when it comes to a cat catarang I've been a one what an amazing experience that must be um anybody see the big yellow Earth moving machines baby caterpillar the shoes brand do do what do you see shoes I saw a shoes brand because someone was wearing them this morning and I I liked what he was wearing okay now what do you think I actually made you write down you see what was in my brain the three letters I train and work on Zoom with International people a lot so what do you think my brain refer to Central African time African time Distortion you need to grasp because the under current rule of distortion the intent of the information does not equal the perception of the information I had intent Central African time perception domestic animals shoes Earth moving lion a yacht on the ocean perception is not based on the intent of the information perception is based on what's already inside of your map we distort based on what's already in our map when I communicate with the client they're going to say things to me I need to get out of my map and listen more objectively and ensure that I'm not distorting when I speak to them very often I will speak you terminology words that matches my map I will very often hear what they say I will judge what is right and what is wrong based on my map all of that is a distortion because it's based on my map my map is neither right or wrong my map is just my map and the question is does my map serve me my client's map is not right or wrong it's a matter of does it serve them are there potential distortions in their map could be you see there are things that happen to us in life and they could be great opportunities but we see them as a default as a negative I've had it so many times where people would say you know I got retrenched I got fired I lost my job I'm I'm panicking I'm in stress mode I don't know what what to do I've tried this I've tried that I'm not making money oh my goodness wo is me I don't know where to go and just sometimes that is probably the best place to be in because that's the time when your creative juices kick in and you start realizing maybe you just got to work a little bit harder it's sometimes the first moment of a great opportunity that lies ahead of you we don't know that it's really a matter of how we look at it if our mind is distorting opportunities we'll see it as threats if our minds distort weaknesses that's the only way we will seek see it Distortion is real we distort based on our culture we distort based on our religion we distort based on our language we distort based on our own personal experiences there's a huge amount of distortion that happens if I say to a lot of people one of the fun things I had in life one of the greatest experiences was to be on a motorcycle and noticing that I'm clocking over 200 km an hour as I go into a corner to me was a extremely thrilling experience if you put most people in that situation they will themselves it's amazing how this AI just deletes some of the words without me having to say them um we all have our own maps of references what we find thrilling exciting what we find beautiful I had a friend once and I'll never forget this he he he had a girlfriend I knew him for quite some time he was going to get married I've never met her and we created an you know a date night the wife and I and the two of them and he says do un for in love with this woman she's the most beautiful woman on the planet and he spoke for for for days on and how beautiful is and every time he refer to her was how beautiful she's the most beautiful woman most beautiful woman the first time I met her I thought she was the ugliest grunt ever I mean what a disappointment jeap is it like seriously dude what you got no filters are you blind you got a cataract what's wrong there's nothing no uh-uh here's the thing in his brain that's Beauty in my brain Beauty looks different is is he is he right am I right no neither we Dort according to our un filtering process give the client permission to filter according to their own process they will distort things in life you're going to hear it as a coach as a coach you can't go no stop it stop it you're wrong you see the way we distort things we believe in that moment that's the right way the problem we have is distortions enter our belief system and once we distort something and we believe it it becomes part of our beliefs the only person that can change our our beliefs is ourselves if anybody else challenges our beliefs we will dig our heels in we will defend it if you have a belief if it's right or wrong if it's distorted if it's factual whatever doesn't really matter if you have a belief and I challenge your belief you will defend it you'll you'll dig your heels in you'll make the belief stronger I'm strengthening the belief so if you do hear a distortion number one nobody's made you a God to decide what what are distortions and what are not what are the right ones and what are not but if you do hear one that's not serving your client don't attack them head on the client needs to realize it themselves some of the techniques will teach you guys is to get them to realize that they are distorting and how to reframe it into a way that serves them cool Sheil you going to hand up yeah could I just please ask when we use the word beliefs yes for me personally I feel like that's a personal thing and I get that but when you see it outside that and say to yourself belief it's like I'm trying to sorry guys I'm trying to explain I'm not very good at explaining these things um well youve were good at explaining that you can't can't explain so maybe you are good at explaining yeah well I'll give it another go then the word belief for me is my personal ownership but I also get confused with beliefs that have been put on me yeah they're not mine correct and when we use the word belief in a interaction with someone I almost feel like I'm conflicting that information because of that understanding of it does that make sense it does so beliefs beliefs are actually quite complex so we've got two elements that should actually fall into the same category the one is beliefs and the second one is values they're very very close to each other beliefs very often people think are only spiritual religious beliefs but what we need to understand is we've got outward beliefs and we've got inward beliefs and we've got internal beliefs so I've got beliefs about the color of the sky I believe the sky is blue I believe grass is green I believe I live in South Africa but I've also got certain conditional beliefs so what is the quality of South Africa what is the economy like what do I believe about the government what do I believe about the suburb I live in what do I believe about the house I'm in what do I believe about my wife my children my grandchildren what do I believe about myself my capabilities my skills what do I believe about my past my present and my future so there's a million millions of things inside of the word belief our beliefs are extremely complex very complex we sometimes have stimulating beliefs we have challenging beliefs we have empowering beliefs we have limiting beliefs I can believe I'm too short I'm Too Tall I'm too young I'm too old those are limiting beliefs I can believe I'm not empowered I was robbed or I can believe I am empowered and I'm I'm gifted all of those belie beliefs the question about beliefs is quite simple does it serve you or is it a handbrake simple as it as simple as it is it a block or is it an empowerment that's the difference that's a great answer for me because that's exactly what I'm looking for how do you present that to somebody your client um in the most simplest way because it is such a comp thing and I just didn't know how to do that so thank you that was brilliant to to make it even more complex because that's what I do for a living I make things more complex is if we take our beliefs and we take our values now again values can be just as complex because we've got internal values external values we got cultural values religious values societal values parental values inherited values false values True Values original values we've got a whole variety of different values um we got value rules you know we might value love but we say well love has got conditions and these are the conditions and they create rules and those rules are broken and then we got um emotional attachment to some values that are actually negative emotions attached to a positive value which becomes a confusing State for the brain but our values am I going too fast good our values and our beliefs actually are one thing we call that identity I am the merger of my values and my beliefs and my identity will always manifest my identity will always be pronounced will be expressed in my reality I cannot hide my identity if one of your elements in your identity is I'm a jogger and you go away for a long weekend and you pack your jogging shoes it's part of your identity your belief system says jogging is fun it's healthy it's good I'll always want to jog one of your values will be Health Quality lifestyle energy outside Etc what will manifest in your life you go away for a long weekend romantic love long weekend with your partner you slip those juggling shoes into your suitcase why spot of your identity it wants to manifest cool we to tomorrow or Monday we're going to do a whole values exercise and we're going to unpack values in detail because there's a huge amount of people around the world that's got Society values or inherited values or cultural values which they are trying to uphold in their lives and they clash with their own personal authentic values you want to live in a really depressed state is trying to live someone else's values you want to live in an amazing fre state self-empowered state find out what are your true values and love them and theine your work and everything you do around them you'll be amazed how much fun you can have in this life all right we're talking about the filters what are the two filters that I mentioned so far have you guys completely deleted that what's the first filter I mentioned we delete delete second filter we rest yes all right third filter we generalize we generalize we we the word we is a generalization us them people these are all generalizations by the way the moment you mention any race group you're generalizing Indian like a bargain generalization blacks have rhythm generalization white people can't run generalization we make a huge amount of generalizations in this world the brain actually loves generalizations generalization fits into the concept of patterns we the reason we do generalizations is it allows us not to have to think so let's do one really good example of a generalization um who of you guys you're sitting on a chair right everybody all of you guys sitting on a chair at the moment right who of you guys took out a tape measure and Engineering calculation and measured the chair did the analogy of the material that's made from and did engineering calculations the chair you're sitting on can actually carry your weight some of you should have I didn't say that out loud did I how did how did you know that the chair you're sitting on could actually carry your way did you think about it even no you did a generalization because inside of your brain your brain has already learned that something made out of that kind of a material that looks like kind of like that that's kind of shaped like that should probably take my weight but that's not something knowledge you were born with see when you were born and you were learning to walk you would sit on anything you would sit on the empty tissue box if there was a balloon on the ground baby would even sit on that you you'd sit on things and certain things give way and other things carry your weight so the brain goes okay things that look like that won't carry my weight things that look like that will that's why at some stage of your life you could sit on a cardboard box and it would carry your weight but each one of you had a surprise somewhere in your life where you sat on a cardboard box and went and it gave away your brain okay change that generalization rule in my brain cardboard box h no no we live in South Africa who's who's ever had those white or green plastic sheets sheets plastic chairs in your garden at your Bri area who's ever had those plastic chairs hot summer and someone sat on those chairs and the leg says whoy ever had that happen yep how did that happen all the brain sat on it felt solid worked everything so it goes into generalization I don't have to think sitting on it I can just put my way down it'll carry me so I I'll put that into a different context it's part of the learning mechanism of the brain and there's a terminology that used it's technically incorrect but it's it's close enough so there's four phases of learning we start off what's called unconsciously incapable it should actually be subconsciously incapable but it's okay we'll call it unconsciously incapable so the Practical example is a 2-year-old doesn't know they cannot drive a motor vehicle unconsciously incapable I do not know that I cannot it's learning phases then the child grows up and at some stage they become consciously incapable I can see the adults driving I know I can't consciously incapable then they go for driving lessons who remembers going for driving lessons that first couple of weeks driving you could drive a car but it took a vast amount of mental energy you were consciously capable you could only drive the car whilst consciously thinking of it you had to think gear one Gear 2 clutch accelerator break mirror overload Panic oh [ __ ] there comes a ball was tough but through repetition repetition repetition repetition repetition repetition repetition repetition repetition repetition repetition the brain entered a state of unconscious capabil doing things without have having to consciously think of it that's the generalization program the brain takes things and throws it into the generalization part of the functionality as fast as possible the brain actually uses a huge amount of blood and oxygen and it can only process so much data at a moment So the faster the the brain can filter things into generalization the better that's why habits form quickly and sometimes are very difficult to break most people think about habits and they think about physical habits are you aware of the fact that you got emotional habits you've got mental habits thought pattern you've got reactive and response habits you've got behavioral habits you've got emotional habits you've got relationship habits you've got workstyle habits habits creep in into every single area of your life because the brain manifests it because then it doesn't have to waste energy thinking on it now here's the challenge with it just because I have installed a behavior doesn't mean that behavior is going to serve me my whole life conditions and Life Changes sometimes we install a behavioral pattern or response or reaction because during that phase of Our Lives it serves us we are human beings sometimes we install a very strong forgiving nature we might be in a condition circumstances a business career path a relationship a situation we're having a very strong forgiving nature doesn't serve us the same thing that a year or 10 ago was a blessing can now become a curse there are times in our lives where we install a very strong and I want to say borderline aggressive kind of approach because at that moment in time it might serve us but later on in life it doesn't we are not stagnant the risk with generalization is realizing that maybe I have some generalizing programs that are running inside of me that when they were installed originally they served me but they don't serve me today anymore because I've changed my conditions have changed my environment has changed everything around me and about me has changed the person I was 20 years ago is not the person I am required to be today is anybody that's still exactly the same person you were 10 years ago no you've changed the question is are they parts of you that hasn't stayed with the change are there parts of you that you've been holding on to that should have changed that didn't generalizations yep guys I grew up in the era where you went to [Music] school ideally after school got a qualification worked for a company preferably the same company if you work for one company for like 30 or 40 years you're like amazing and then you retire at the age of 55 who you guys remember those days wasn't that weird jeez like Society we live in has changed it's changed qualifications don't carry the same value they used to very few people enter company and stay with the same company in fact if you're in Recruitment and you see some of has been in the same company for 20 years you going to ask a couple of questions you want to see that Variety in Spice in growth and development and I know very few people can afford to retire at the age of 55 our economy in the world has changed come on so can I hold on to generalizations from 20 years ago no I can't so when I communicate and Coach my client very often very often the stumbling blocks they have in their lives it's not what's happening in the present it's the generalizations they have of yester year that's still present make sense so what does the brain do to filter vast amounts of information it deletes it distorts it generalizes now I am left with a usable amount of information but the challenge we have is is the delion is the Distortion is the generalization Because unless we understand that it is happening we're not going to be able to communicate correctly and we're not going able to coach correctly if my client is having a challenge because they're deleting things my job is not to help them distort it differently my job is to bring it to the surface to help them become aware of it to undelete certain things when they're distorting certain things my job is to help them see through a different perspective when they are generalizing certain things my job is to bring it to the surface so they can focus on analyze it and become all consciously aware of things so I need to be able to listen not just to what is being said what is not being said what is being distorted what is generalization but also what is the basic current of the conversation and the challenge they're experiencing and I need to be aware of my own deletion Distortion generalization all of these things at the same time so for me to do it masterfully I cannot do it when I need to think about it I need to practice it sufficient so I can do it unconsciously capable so my energy in the coaching session can be focused on the client and not are they deleting distorting generalization I need to hear that without having to think about it cool everybody gone this this room has gone very quiet very quiet very quiet very like oh my very very like the energies what's happened Joel it's all good there's so much running around my head I've got to sort that out and not delete it all just listen to that interesting statement I've got so much running around in my head what little man what what's happening there they got legs what's running what what I've got these millions of Highways and they all connecting oh then I threw my glasses off interconnecting and like what must go where and how and I'm think hold on there you've got it still assess all of this now here's an interesting interesting fact you guys have heard and learned or recognize way too much information today for your conscious brain to be able to think of all of it and process it and grasp it your subconscious brain can however let me let me make an analogy who likes reading you like reading every most of you guys you read you've read a book right now when you read a book and someone asks you what is written on the second paragraph on page 147 can you remember like that no but if someone asks you what's the basic story line can you tell them the story line but if you do go to page 147 and you read the page does your brain recognizing oh yes yes this this is where it fits in the story Learning Happens the same way what's important for you to remember is the story line constantly go back to the manual watch the recording so your brain can recognize repeatedly what you know that's how it enters the deeper subconscious and how it goes into automatic understanding make sense y you if you're going to try and think logically so some of you guys when you finish now you know your family your friends say and how was your day on the course was it fun oh it was lovely it was lovely what did you learn and then in 2 or 3 minutes you're going to try and tell tell them what I told you the whole day and they're going to look at you with a very blank expression they're going to um because you would have deleted distorted and generalized of 90% 99% of what been said today it's natural it's normal but you are also going to struggle to repeat everything to them because at the moment all of that data is lying in your Inay tonight whilst you sleep your brain is going to go to that int and say okay let me start Pro let me start finding let me start figuring this out tomorrow morning you're going wake up and one of two things going to happen you're going to go oh that was interesting day yesterday or oh my word I'm even confused more now jeez probably both cool all right any questions so far okay what's one thing you remember remember about today Sheila Bob one thing give me one nugget of information you remember about today you made me laugh but additional for that I like the way you deliver because your animation creates an installation here because I'm a visual learner but what I was going to say was I think overall I what I've learned today is that um listening is probably the biggest skill you're going to have y That's the all thing we got two years in one month for a reason Jill what's your nugget food today I'm going to go through everybody feelings serve us say repeat feelings serve us they serve good bad to be able to know what they're about makes us real man makes us authentic makes us real nice one um St you take something today I know you've beat on you a few times Maybe I I love the metaphor you used for with the dry Leaf floating um it's actually something I would most probably use in my next training session wonderful way of explaining it most welcome and the reason why he got permission to use it for those who don't know I've got no copyright on intellectual property anything I say in these platforms you are most welcome to teach anywhere without asking I don't believe in the concept of intellectual property bunch of rubbish greedy people use that all right drine what's your takeaway for today um a lot you say that every time and this is your 17th course um I had a lot of epiphanies that I won't share now but I like uh the the leavea going down the stream thing okay that kind of sticks out a lot explains a lot okay I ask feedback guys because your feedback tells me what I should repeat in the future courses sio thank you Theon what I take from this day is my brother B I love this to share the story yeah and in most black communities this is what we experiencing as age Brothers will fall or follow the wrong crowds and end up experiencing lot of things which sometimes keep everything they could ever do with their lives they remain they end up in jail Hospital [ __ ] and all that but you you stood up my brother you changed your life based on the effects that you've experienced these circumstances and you don't want any other person to experience the circumstances and even though they may experience their circumstan you are there for them to walk them through that life of going off walking out of those circumstances I upload and another thing that sharing being authentic creates more more Unity us I've been reading I saw your comments guys and I realiz see I sharing it's a sign of caring thank you it's fascinating that sio that you talk about authenticity um you are one of the most authentic people I have met every single time you come on these platforms I absolutely just enjoy you and appreciate anybody ask when he talks you can just hear that passion that deep I was want to say see you're a deep soul my brother you're a deep Soul that's all I can say that's the probably the best description and I love it when you come on these platforms so thank you for being you all right Doug what's your takeaway for today um de I think the the first thing was you when you were talking about anxiety and um getting out of your comfort zone uh yesterday in particular I felt very uh excited but uh out of my that I'm about to walk into something now you know that that now is going to change my life and something that I've been really looking forward to so I mean I've taken in so much today and like you say if I had to go now walk through to the lounge and tell my wife I she don't know what I'll say um it'll it'll all be gone you know but here's a dictionary put it together yourself yeah well one one of the takes is um you know kind of retraining my brain to listen differently I quite like that um and uh yeah that's that's one one of the biggest things switching with my reality and listening listening deeper your wife will thank me later I'll let her know uh Raa what's your takeaway thank you so much um see the words you were able to articulate so beautifully so much of what is already starting to happen naturally so in the coaching process I've started thinking oh I'm saying this is this because it's how I think or am I interpreting how she thinks correctly so I think that was the biggest one for me I kind of summarized everything into one page for myself because I have to see it how you went through it but I think this deletion Distortion and generalization is power it I could actually go back into sessions that I mean yesterday I coach the whole day and I'm sitting here and questioning myself on some of those interactions that I had and I think the biggest thing for me today Dion is the work starts here first before going out to actually confidently coach there and uh I'm so grateful so grateful for the opportunity I want to answer that one and say not necessarily actually well that's how it's been feeling predominantly for me today it's like I've been coaching for years and I'm going goodness have I done enough work consciously doing a lot of work I think for myself on myself we should always be on a journey of improving self but here's here's a statement I want to make one of the risks that that we have in this industry a lot of people believe I've got to fix myself before I can coach others is there anybody that kind of think that or things in that line guys do me a favor please please please please please get rid of that absolute lie you're telling yourself because here's the truth you are never going to get to a level of perfection good enough to coach others if you think you are please do me a favor the day you get to that level phone me CU then clearly you're some kind of a God then I should come and worship you because there's something amazing about you every single one of us we're human we've got errors we've got gray areas we' got faults we are Learning Journey of becoming a better version of us that's all we can be is be on a journey our job is not to reach Perfection neither is it to get our clients to Perfection our job is to assist them on their journey of self-improvement and even if we only assist them to change one small percent of their lives we've done our job it's not our job to transform them to re recreate them to bring massive epiphanies the moment we do that we are actually putting pressure on them we're putting pressure on ourselves and what that's going to cause is we're going to get into a state of not being authentic authenticity authenticity doesn't have expectation of others authenticity Embraces others and Embraces and enjoys change doesn't expect it is that all right cool bunny what's did you learn anything today go yeah um I think um I'm with Doug uh with the the things that he sh um I think the conditioning of the subconscious um was a big highlight for me um and also just the the state um and how it frames you know everything that filters in and how you process it um yeah those were my big things from today is going deep in her own brain again I love it sist almost on the master course I hope you learned something absolutely Leon so um two things that um I take away from today as you were saying that talking about the leaf as a metaphor um let the leaf go past you know um I'm busy writing a book um with experiences I had in the past hoping to help people go through similar things yeah and yesterday I went into a specific part and I sort of hovered onto it and it put me in a bad mood and now I'm trying to think I'm busy writing a book so I got to put myself back in that position but it made me so negative trying to think how am I going to write about this um without attaching those feelings to it yeah and the other thing um that's easy because I can tell you about a leaf going down the stream without following the leaf objectivity allows us to describe without experiencing fully that's what I need to learn to do yeah so yeah so for the rest of the group Celeste I'm interrupting you I know but there's a concept that you guys really need to be able to master as coaches you have to understand you on this you're on this journey because you're an empath you're on this journey because you really want to help people you're on this journey because because you feel deeply pain pleasure and the emotions of those around you one of the reasons you are here is because you're not just an empath you're an empath and steroids and you've got this desire to make the world a better place the problem with that is when you coach people you have a subjective experience you immerge yourself in the experience CES wants to write a book she wants to share this with other world she's experience when she thinks about it she gets subjective you we get entangled with that experience you need to learn to develop what's called a meta State a meta state is a state above States a an awareness State the example I usually use if you go for a walk in the forest tall trees Dark Forest you can't see anything you don't know what's North or South you got no idea where you entered you got no idea where you exited there's a route there's Pathways there's turns you've got zero idea what's happening because you're in the midst of that for Forest that's a subjective experience but if you've got a hovercraft with a camera above the trees you can direct as coaches when we journey through the coaching process and our own lives have the subjective experience but practice the hovering the The Meta state so when you think about your experiences of yesterday yes you'll feel the emotions but ask yourself what is the objective view I have from this and enter that state as well I hope that helps the Le yeah thank you Dion so I could um I could look at it from someone else's point of view it's just that obviously experiencing it from my side and telling it makes it more authentic and that's what I wanted to go on to another thing you say today is people um being authentic and having passion and really caring about people and what they do um so many times stands in a big crowd and um he has to do a talk and he says to me that he's extremely nervous and I could never understand that cuz I'm thinking if you're a speaker or whatever you have to never feel nervous because you obviously know how to do it so you're that just might me think again it's true what you're saying so you never a this by the way the going I haven't done any coaching di just just so you guys know the background why I'm teasing her on this so her husband is an active coach he's a public speaker he's a sales Guru um he's been in this industry a long time and I think you came with the scores just for yourself just to go through it and you actually fell in love to a certain extent on the course with coaching so I was wondering if you actually started getting into it U but you are back here now and that's just an interesting s this is all day one said well I'm just here to learn a little bit about self I'm not going to going to really get into this stuff and you here for a second time so welcome back nice see you all right yes I can see you unmuting you want to jum in there and say something about it she's not she's not gonna Co but yet yeah we are yeah write writing a book to help other people overcome their challenges I'm I'm just giggling in the background all right Katherine what's your takeaway today you've also been on the score 17 times already I did you learn anything today go you know what for me it's a repetition and it's every time it's different I mean you you're saying the you're saying you're repeating certain things but you always hear something and learn something differently and it's the people the people make it the group yeah the group dynamic the stories people share you know it just and the laughter the laughter is so yeah it's amazing but I mean there's lots of other the delete distort you know all of that but uh yeah the people you've been through this so many times next time you must go and teach this class I'll just sit in the background and listen thank you all right uh star um I think I've decided that I'm going to now call you seu do you know what seu is no it's a master in martial arts but you're definitely the seu of NLP and life coaching I a certified Master but yeah yes I know that um I think short and sweet what I take away is get out of your own head keep your eego in check um yes right good good don't make assumptions don't make assumptions I love the beating me with Chas what you love you love beating me with chairs that was your no when you said the lady said my husband beats me every Friday night and I immediately also thought drunken fights whatever so it was such did it again yeah thank you awesome awesome uh next up Jackie what's your take away for today um yeah I'm also on to what star said I've actually got it written down as we went along is never make any assumptions and also going back to the chess thing but also when you said that I went back to my daughter calling me one morning saying her and the husband are having a fight and she's sick of it and I'm thinking well how am I going to politely or very nicely say to maybe you should drink less on a Frid and she goes mommy but that's what it's got nothing to do with the drinking we had a break in so yeah assumptions oh oh I think I don't have another word because I think it's so it comes naturally doesn't it assumptions sometimes it takes one word to create like you call it a whole movie yeah it's it's a learned behavior to be honest it is a learned behavior and the and assuming everything and a lot is a well learned behavior and all behaviors that are learned can be unlearned so we can actually teach our brains hold on a second hand break up let me think about this before I go further yeah and then of course I think everything goes back to listening active listening reflective listening um I think it it all pulls together because if if you don't listen properly then you're going to miss everything that you've said today um and yeah the qu I'm taking with me is n that fire together wire together I've never heard that one before okay but I like it yeah cool awesome thanks Jackie cir you learn anything today you also been here in the food time so yeah like I said at the beginning that it's really good good to this is my second one and it feels different uh it's almost like the knowledge is getting embedded so I like that um but a particular thing I I liked is um when you said the subconscious already knows all the answers I I thought that was brilliant um because you know when I'm coaching I'm always telling my coaches that look I'm not here to provide the answers you've got the answers or I'm doing is helping them bring them to the surface exactly so so this resonates with me and and and I I like it very very true nice sonali uh my takeaway was uh definitely making the assumptions like Star said and how you have a scenario but you should actively listen first that was a very interesting one that really made my head explode it's like wow like that's you should actively listen to somebody before making uh assumptions so you can help them properly and not based on your own assumption so yeah uh sorry before I proceed I have an appointment in a few minutes is it okay for off thank you so much uh I look forward to more I will get on to coaching and I will keep in contact with you unfortunately I just started myu a week ago now there's a process of getting certifications assessments and exams they more important than us we get it we get it they more important than us be honest they actually my money bank to get into coaching so I don't really want mom and dad to fund it I'm to all for that you know the independence needs to be in process right now but thank you all so much it was such a pleasure to meet all of you thank you Dion and I wish you all the best and uh thank you all so much bye have a lovely weekend ahead and I look forward to more and I before you bye everybody thank you all righty Michael couple of observations uh this the second time I'm doing NLP and boy you certainly brought a lot of it back uh even when Sylvia was sitting in the background uh she was making some comments there and yeah okay and and you know she's done it twice okay so my three takeaways firstly uh when you spelled the letter c a so I'm quite involved in um addiction so what did I think of Crystal yeah well let's not go down that road anyway uh my three takeaways first one thoughts of multiple voice is in your head extremely fast that one caught me frivolous certainly do you understand your wife better now Michael [Laughter] no the reason I'm here is so she can understand me give me I just being Wicked that's all I just being naughty so the thoughts uh multiple voices in your head extremely fast hell that is so true frivolous certainly and they change direction quickly uh you know when you when you think of it not only are they fast but the bloody change lanes so quickly y so that that made me think a little bit the second one was which wolf do you feed uh you know when when you ask the question wolf in the shade wolf in the sun I mean who doesn't matter just just for the record I've got wolves in the house two Siberian huskys so it's very to my heart thank you yeah you'll see them during the week they they come and do my admin during the week they most welcome and then the third one and they talk as well I hope they talk and they round about 5:00 she starts with him you know and they run up to dinner and they don't stop first thing in the morning and then round about dinner time I've Got Friends they've got 14 yeah no I don't know how they do it two is more than enough right then the third one does your belief serve you or is it a handbrake and you know from a an addiction side of things that is going to be extremely powerful for me going forward where I actually I pull the handbrake by asking them does your belief serve you yeah so those are my takeaways for today can't wait to unpack uh yeah that's it good one good one Michael nice uh d h d you've been very quiet today I've been listening in um and I think what I appreciate the most is the the experience of repetition you know as you hear the things over and over again you you learn I'm learning from that um and it's very comforting to hear Dion that we don't have to be perfect that for me was just like you know I don't have to be perfect I am a a work in progress all the time that comforted me the most and also um that I have to let go of my ego man so I'm I'm watching over my ego all the time when I coach to say is my ego what is my ego saying you know and I appreciate that so much and thank you for allowing us you know to come over and over again to just learn and learn um yeah I really appreciate great joy having you guys here thanks all right mie um so this is the beginning of my journey um what I'm taking away today is that and it's quite um profound for me that starting the journey being a colleague or a family member or a friend your knee joke reaction is to say I know and I totally relate and the big thing for me is that your internal processing my internal processing will be a huge impact whether I'm a very good coach or not and my interaction with that person so that was a huge uh switch for me and um definitely what I'm taking away for today cool yeah we we say that but in reality we can't walk in other people's shoes you know we don't really know what they're going through U we might have similar experiences but you've never walked in someone else's shoes it's not possible it's just not possible D hello you've can also been very quiet I've I've been listening in Dion um I think I think for me also just again the realization of how complicated our minds our brains are and how unique we each are and that we can never ever think we know what goes on in someone else's mind but that we can and just just by by learning what we're learning here it's just a way to better understand someone else and I think just a little bit of knowledge of the mind and of the brain is such a benefit to us to be able to help someone else nice that's worth looking at like and then also the way that you teach with your analogies and your metaphors is it's a lot of information if it's just the theory but by by telling it and putting it a story and an analogy and a metaphor really sticks really sticks in my mind and I understand it so much better so so I think even coaching with metaphors and analogies is is important for your clients it's an easier way to understand complicated information that's why there's a section in the manual metaphors creating metaphors yeah you're right um yeah I I like I like what you said you you stirred something there nice nice nice observation D it um Justine um man there are so many notes that I made but um choice and um choice and action because the story of the leaf really stuck with me because I'm transitioning from the classroom to design so I want to move to the background and NLP is then part of my plan for next year that's why I'm coming to the open day now because I I definitely like that love eat breathe what you need to do and then I just added to become that instructional designer comes back to Choice nice nice like last but not least sorry guys I only see you if your camera is on if you're in the room your camera is not on I don't see you um ban what's your take away for today how's it all right um thank you from the start from the very start to the very finish like and I I also made a lot of notes here like um but I really like the analogies that you made uh from the pink from the pink elephant in the room to the crack on the window to looking around the room and looking at the looking for the the Reds all over the room and then um asking about how many Blues there are you know um the analogy of the the the leaf in the Stream and channeling those emotions um yeah so thank you for putting such a so such vivid pictures that you know what it just comes together with the explanation and and and what we need to learn I think that was lovely that's definitely what I've definitely taken out of here thank you so much I'll see you tomorrow B uh I see Le thanks I love your energy uh Le decided to switch your camera on hello Le only well I just wanted to let you know that I've been here all the time but I also have to admit that I've been painting a wall in the past few hour and this whole wall is just full of NLP and it's taken me back since 2017 when I did my first course with you and what I really took with me today is the fact that You' never have to be perfect to be a good coach yeah and I'm actually getting Goosebumps while saying this that what after how many years i' hav ENC counted is that yes you do get better and the conscious mind you know doesn't even think about coaching anymore and you you do coaching on people without even realizing it but what I really took um a word today is a reminder that um if you love what you do you don't really ever work and that is why I love my drug so much is the fact that not only do I work on myself every day when I coach people but I make a huge difference to other people's lives and it could just be a small smile especially here in Germany uh you don't just smile randomly at Germans and and it makes a difference in their life whether they think about who the hell am I for the rest of the day or whether if they appreciate it and yes thank you yeah how what one how how do you know German's laughing me that was funny that's true but thank you so much quick question when you trained were we upstairs in the in the office in fairlands yes so you saw the red wall yes is that the wall you recreating is that what you mean well it's it's pink okay I must be honest I do miss that wall so for the rest of the guys we had a massive wall in the office we painted it in our corporate we've got our colors are basically gray white and red it was like fire engine red and I had someone come in with white vinyl and right words inspirational words all over the wall but it was a long wall I mean it was like uh it was long I can't remember the M but it was a long wall and it was always I just loved that wall I could stare at it for hours just read the words all over the place yeah it was an impactful wall yeah and by the way we left when just before Co we left those offices that wall nobody's moving to those offices in the time and the wall is still there okay well maybe you need to go and take a high resolution photo and use it as your Zoom background yeah that's not a bad but I like my background all right beautiful people I'm going to land this plan it's I said we're going to finish between 2 and 2:30 and uh how perfect is that in the middle between 2 and 2:30 h 2 and 3 I mean um is 230 I do hope that if you a one day visitor here that you will well make a decision and join us in the future first thing I want to say is the one day is the open day is open to the public if you want to invite someone for the next one we run these courses every month you are most welcome if you want to ask me about the training and you do have some questions guys you've got my WhatsApp number right is there anybody here that doesn't have it if you don't have it I'll tell you but you should have it um pop me a WhatsApp we can chat I'm it's not the end of the world um I am going for a BRI and rugby but I will probably be available for bom another 30 minutes or so if you guys do want to have a chat and you're most welcome to chat I'll see you guys the rest of you I'll see you tomorrow have a brilliant day R evening and let's all just go go Booker go B go B cheers Dion thanks man cheers everybody see you guys tomorrow morning thank you so much thank you bye bye bye bye everyone thanks Dion bye out Dion yo bye bye rather than call next week maybe I can have a quick chat with you now is that possible or is everybody else it's being recorded and there's other people in the room so it's not going to be a private conversation uhpp you want to give me a WhatsApp call in I need to go for a quick body break no no listen no no no I'll call you Monday as we agree don't worry it's absolutely fine we can do if you give me 10 minutes you no honestly no oh just go and relax absolutely fine go and relax and thank you so much it's been an amazing day and just what I needed to stimulate me again to get moving on this so I look forward to coming on the course I've already decided I'm going to do that and we'll be in touch nice to meet everybody thank you so much your take care bye bye app it thank you sorry Dion just a quick question your WhatApp your WhatsApp number that you referred to I've got two actually I've got a private one and I got a work one so if you uh how did I communicate with you which number did we use I don't know it's a number that um I got from somebody else so I'm not sure if it's your number whose number it was actually given to me as Nicole's number 083 262 2096 that number3 262 yeah 2096 yeah there's there's a high probability that you you thought you were speaking to call with you actually talking to me just going to check the oh no it doesn't have a number on here because send me send me um so you you you communicated via WhatsApp right yeah but it this doesn't give me a number it's a business account so yeah okay what's your give me your number quick give me the last four digits of your number um 545 545 jaine wison did you just get a hello from me yep I did thank you so much great cool thank you for the session uh enjoy the Bri and the rugby I shall I shall see you tomorrow bye bye guys Chow cheers then
NLP Life Coach September 2024 Day 1
